Right? It’s kind of weird. And I’m definitely not a superstitious person at all. And about 5 minutes ago, an extension cord that I had sitting on the step of a ladder just fell off - but didn’t just fall straight down to the ground, it looked like it had been flung off the step, like down but outward towards me.

Thank you. There’s been a few moments where i’ve been alone in the living room and I hear footsteps in one of the back rooms. A few weeks ago, I felt someone touch my back and I was alone. Tonight I heard laughing right behind me.

The world would not be the same without you in it.

Today I graduated with a B.A. in Sociology. It only took me 15 years to finally get a college degree, but I did it. I finally did...something with my life.

I finally got to see this movie yesterday and behind all of my “holy shit”’s and “wtf”’s, I kept admiring that little separate treehouse thing with the heaters. I want one.

It legitimately makes me sad when I overhear someone at my school saying how hot he is.

I thought the same, but it seems like Eden wants nothing more than to please Nick, so snitching on him seems kind of unlikely. Unless she gets fed up with his coldness (which is why that Nick needs to get with the program and feign some interest in her).

No, stop. No. Just stop. They need to stop. Someone stop them. Someone stop everybody.

Why can’t y’all just date

Yeah. Stop being a pussy and serve some motherfucking thick-ass BROCCOLI.

Congratulations?

Dude, I am fucking really sad about this. I met him once and he was so nice and funny. I watched all his shows. I’m just really fucking sad about this. This comment isn’t even that coherent. Just, what the fuck. And Eric Ripert found his body?? Jesus.

Young people are fucking weird.

They really literally are. The Kardashians have so much money and fame they could care less about getting an education past high school. Kanye doesn’t believe in reading. I feel bad for their kids, who will probably grow to be just as empty and dim as the rest of them.

Kanye looks stupid as fuck.

Pfft, I don’t even have that kind of luxury. The standard is Times New Roman. 12 point. One-inch margins. Double-spaced.

LOL oh my god. Both those comics are me. Especially the “dear god I beg you” part. I just realized it’s 7 pm and I had started my Word document at noon. So far i’ve written my name. GREAT START.

Only 21 more days till graduation. 21. Days. I’m never going to look at another Abstract or Methods section again. After this shit is done I can move on to whatever the hell I’m going to do with my life that probably has nothing to do with my major.

Exederm FTW!

Somehow i’m not surprised. When I worked at a pie shop in LA Jason Bateman was by far the worst celebrity I encountered in the shop. He refused to look me in the face but still barked orders at me. You could just tell he felt bothered by women fucking existing around him.