As funny as this is, I can almost guarantee he actually thought there would be some sort of orientation video. “Welcome! Congratulations on being elected to be the leader of the free world...”

“And so, in conclusion, it is my opinion that the third way to kill a mockingbird was the best of the book. The others seemed like they would be too hard. Thank you.”

Unfortunately, it looks like Trump has followed the lead of the rest of American workers who hate our jobs, by deciding to do it in the most half assed way we can get away with and not get fired

Well, at this point, the United States are kinda the Knicks of the world.

DENMAKR is a dating app that describes itself as being “for Bob Villa types.”

A cab driver almost hit me on my bike two years ago when I had to swerve to avoid a pedestrian who stepped into the bike lane on Bleecker. He also honked his horn. The press never reported anything about it.

that second picture is marvelous

I suppose they can go and live with Peter Thiel in New Zealand. At the very least, they can have parties to which they don’t invite him...

I adore Beyoncé, but have a feeling the Carter babies will be just fine. All the non-celebrity, non-rich Carter babies of color in the country . . . not so much.

They will be fine because they’re rich. Mostly. They are still Black, but money and fame are great insulators...most of the time.

Not just you, but then I’m the Grinch of Major Life Events and am easily annoyed by how extra people can be with these things in the age of social media.

looks la picture you take while on vacation somewhere on Caribbean or at Sears

So extra ...

Trump: AMERICA FIRST.

You still live in that alternate reality known as “reality.” Better get cured of that, comrade.

To be fair, I don’t think Trump was referring to Langer when he said “that German guy had some interesting thoughts.”

Venus is very happy, and I’m happy, too, because  she’ll be playing her sister in the final.

to the tune of “murder car,” duh

Self driving Google cars go amuck. It’s a subcategory of Rise of the Machines, but more annoying because the “perils of disruption” thumbsucking thinkpieces that get published while we’re all being hunted down.

Came here to say this. That’s... quite a trajectory. A distillation, really. Take anything that was coherent and sensical about Goldwater, boil it away, and you’re reduced to Reagan. Take that and spin it down, and you’ve got a hard lump of stupid named George W. Bush. Take that and burn it in a crucible, and you’ve…