Texas Man is like the Special Forces version of Florida Man. You don’t see him nearly as often, but when he shows up, the destruction is far greater.

Are they trying to measure impairment, or trying to measure BAC? They are not exactly the same thing. Habitual drinkers do seem to handle higher BAC with less impairment. BAC is easily and reliably measurable, but impairment is not quite the same.

Fuck this guy. I am a two-time loser (which is nothing to be proud of), and while the hardest thing I have ever done, bar none, is give up alcohol forever, I did it and have been sober for more than seven years.

Easiest way to tell the difference, if you paid $11 for the beer and you got a case instead of a six pack, you got Keystone.

“I made a terrible decision”

Hmmm... Let me run that through the Jalopnik article accuracy verification system.

Jeep in article name.

Author David Tracy.

Yep, it checks out.

Holy fuck nuggets lady. You need some serious help.

Cervical cancer, that’s why our children get the shot! All three of my boys have the HPV shot to protect any girlfriends they might have.

Yikes, your poor son will be a man one day.

while I agree with your sentiment, getting your daughter vaccinated for hpv does not imply she or you are sluts or deviants. It may very well save her life one day. And it’s likely better for her to get it young; once she’s had a certain number of sexual partners in adulthood (a by no means large number, either) she…

Any good doctor would have made that recommendation. You thinking he was implying you’re a floozy does not make any sense.

I could not be happier you aren’t my mother.

“...to be removed fully from his co-ownership of the magazine.”

That would be a perfectly acceptable statement if the system wasn’t set up so young productive players also do not get paid. The “what can you do for me now” attitude should apply both ways.

How on earth can anyone be this irony impaired?

It’s actually fascinating how much you’re trying to pretend you don’t know you said a dumb thing.

You must be new around these parts. Welcome! I can already tell you’re going to do great.

Relax, he is a staff writer.

But was the National Anthem playing when he stood?

There does appear to be excess space between the panels.

*Waves* :)

I’d prefer politicians stop acting like idiots and letting themselves get played by billionaires. This article should focus on the idiocy of the public servants, not the shady/legal behavior of a business professional.