Lamborghini cars should be limited to 15mph from the factory.

“the happy ending to a remarkable recovery story” is the ideal way to end a therapeutic massage.

On second thought, probably best she doesn’t get more experience.

Good job ISIS. Now even dogs hate you. What’s next? whales? pandas? baby sloths?

Found on ebay:

2015 USAF Ghostrider Gunship
One of a kind
Babied...never tracked or raced...never wintered.
New wings and recently replaced OEM flight crew buckets.
$50 million OBO.
No tire kickers, no mavericks.

A beautiful piece and great read. I will bring up one minor counterpoint to your faculty diversity numbers cited. Those numbers may indicate systemic racism in the Yale hiring process, but those numbers mirror the ethnicity ratios of men and women with a master's degree or higher. They also mirror men and women over…

The response of the students to their meeting with school executives is embarrassing. They’re complaining about a lack of “empathy” from people that are acting professionally. These aren’t their therapists; it’s the goddamn DEAN OF THE SCHOOL..

These are people that would try to relate to the bear that is eating them. It's better to be the person that isn't being eaten.

Tyler, thank you for your sensible, not sensationalist, reporting!

>Syria is not worth starting WWIII over.

Yeah, too bad they’re too stupid to realize that every single one of the rapes is beyond the statute of limitations for a civil suit. So these women actually can’t go after his money. I wonder what their motivation is if it isn’t money? Could they actually be telling the truth?

Seriously, who would ever buy Lions season tickets?

To be fair it's just so people know where to take him when he passes out in the shitter.

Cecil didn’t die for this, man.

Coming Thanksgiving Eve, San Antonio John Jay takes on Sayreville High School is the first ever Walmart Awful Bowl, Presented by Comcast, at Beaver Stadium in State College, Pa. Featuring honorary co-captains Aaron Hernandez and Lawrence Phillips, a commemorative coin toss by Ray Carruth, and a thrilling halftime show…

One kid going out of his way to ambush an official is one thing. Two of them doing at once tells me this was ordered from the sidelines. If that’s true, end their season right now and fire the staff.

Tyler thanks for your posts as they seem to be making up 70% of Jalopnik lately. Thats fine because they are great articles, educational, informative, entertaining.

Can’t you miserable people be happy he’s making that kind of money?

I have a really good relationship with my independent mechanic. I had about $4000 worth of work done on one of my cars and when I was on the way home all of a sudden there was a big bang and a big cloud of smoke. The automatic transmission that had just been serviced blew some kind of a seal.