I watched 50 shades freed on demand and it was so dumb I lost IQ points.

Read the E! article and if even an eighth of it is true, Demi needs some new friends. She is a known addict and if they were really cheering her on while she was taking shots, well, that’s super shitty. 

I’ve always thought Trump is basically a very, very, very stupid King Henry VIII.

If he can teach her enunciation I’m all for it???

I’m glad Greitens is resigning. I hope he also goes to jail for a long time for sexually assaulting and blackmailing this poor woman.

Look, I’m no fan of Chip & Jo’s wacky religiosity, nor of Jo’s absurd over-use of shiplap, but to then go and be like, “They’re rich now and haven’t retired therefore they’re bad parents,” is just utterly ridiculous. Unless you have like video proof that they’re beating their kids or not vaccinating them or teaching…

Yes, they do know that.

All, I got a three-page, single-spaced love note from my 8th grade “boyfriend” after I “broke up with him” (we went on one movie date and held hands twice, it was a simpler time, sigh) in 1998 that was better written and more coherent than this.

He’s a minor though...even if they try him as an adult, even in Texas I think they can’t do the death penalty here.

True story: I am flying to Pittsburgh tomorrow (connecting from SFO through PHOENIX, ugh fucking kill me) for a friend’s wedding, to which I do nOT YET HAVE A DATE.

My mom got married in the ‘70s, had me in the ‘80s. All my teachers/friends/whoever in the ‘90s were like fucking FLABBERGASTED that she had a different last name from me and my dad and brother. They just couldn’t handle it. She didn’t care when people call her “Mrs. HusbandLastName” anyways, but I would get mad and…

Yep yep yep. At least my parents understand. When I say I may not want kids for financial reasons as well as like, not really being super into it, she’s like, “I get it.” Think of the difference:

THANK YOU. Like, my god, why is it that in order to be considered worthy of anything in this fucking world as a woman you have to clean up after a bunch of other people’s emotional (in the case of a husband) and literal (in the case of children and also possibly a husband) shit? I take care of my own damn self and…

i dunno, the first episode was fine, but the second one was just a gut punch. Once again, Alexis Bledel hits it out of the park, and the flashbacks to the airport...more affecting than any of the violence the handmaids go through in episode 1.

I really hope they name the kid Barack just to FUCK with Trump.

Related question: my little brother has grown a beard. I like it, though it needs some trimming (he just went for it and it’s a bit ragged after a couple months). However, with a beard he (correctly) doesn’t wash his beard every single day and I think he is therefore missing out on washing his fullface and stuff as…

not with my assets there isn’t. Not in my state.

same. my bff and i talk about this all the time - we’re like, if we were a bit dumber, would we have fewer expectations of ourselves and be less dissatisfied with what we’ve done/what we’re doing? Then again, it’s nice to be able to get certain jokes, so, trade-offs?

I assume two of them are people old enough to drive who gave a ride to the 15-year-old and 9-year-old involved in this mess?

I just watched about 15 seconds of the 9-year-old’s (and like...I really hope like she is either a very young-looking 15-18 year old or there is some sort of weird performance-artist-management thing going on here because no 9 year old should be spending any time in this manner) video where she’s dissing the…