“I’m very slender, but not, you know, sick-skinny, so am therefore super-relatable, allowing thousands of teen girls to imagine me as their avatar!”

Shit so I’m a superhero too?

I’m so sorry :(

I am proud because I got a very good first review at work with extra bonus $$$ :)

I am so jealous of your wine/cheese/charcuterie/tv/dog/bed situation rn.

I know! Like, he would literally not be able to handle that job because it involves human interaction and is therefore tough. But at least a fair pamphlet-hander-outer can go home after the fair and not worry about their actions causing nuclear war...

What sorts of things make Trump angry? Only the sorts of things that, as president, he unfailingly faces daily:

I watch Meyers’s monologue and “A Closer Look” every night, along with Colbert’s monologue/opening segment. Between the two of them, they are keeping me somewhat sane. Meyers really did an extraordinary job with this segment, though - above and beyond the usual. His insight is piercing, the writing sharp, the…

Yep. My dad’s the sole sane liberal in his family, who are all right-wing racist nutjobs.

yeahhhh it’s lawrence and bardem :/

i agree! I fucking hate her guts straight to hell, but she looks nice. Like, sean spicer couldn’t find a suit that fit, and that’s much easier for men - but she looks great. That is the first and last kind thing I will ever say about her, too.

She is twenty-four? I thought she was like 36, maybe 40 if she’d had excellent work done. Put on enough makeup and I guess you move beyond easily identifiable age...

I live 3k miles away from my parents. I go back for xmas and thanksgiving, usually, though I’ve had to miss the occasional thanksgiving. Also, usually once in the summer for fun because they live in a nice place :) Every couple years we also have a joint family vacation where we all agree to meet somewhere cool (last…

Done, thanks for sharing!

Seriously. That’s some fucked-up shit to just say spur of the moment. He thinks about this stuff. A lot.

i’m so fucking with you.

THISSSSSS

Plenty of normal IQ or straight-up brilliant people who are fucking awful parents who perpetrate everything from physical and emotional abuse to brainwashing them into religious cults (Duggars and Scientologists, anyone?), and their behavior is either smartly hidden or widely accepted. This situation seems fishy at…

they’re friends, so probably

I wondered if he was ill. I’m sorry I was right, but also it does explain a couple things to be honest...