Melania was always Ivanka sitting on Jared’s shoulders in a trench coat and sunglasses.

“Lying Media says I have (or had) a Wife. FAKE NEWS! I have always been a Bachelor and there is NO SMELL coming from my Basement! MAGA”

Melanie is just a figment of our imagination

Imagine how it must feel for Dylan to hear him say this.

Two. Two children.

He was also brave enough to wait until Mariel Hemingway was 18 before he tried to seduce her. Not only a hero, but a perfect gentleman.

OK, first of all, contrary to your bullshit screwball neurotic shadow that you propped up in every movie like some sort of hero in the 70s for incels everywhere, Woody, you are not a “boy.” You are a man.

Let’s give it up for Woody “I Only Raped Two Daughters” Allen, everyone.

Hey Woody:

Omg this is tragic. I hope this is fake for this lady.

Honestly, trump would love it if she were dead. His ratings would shoot through the roof from sympathy points. He would also probably say she died due to the stress of the mueller investigation. It would the best thing to happen to him.

The term you are looking for is capitalism. Capitalism is oppression.

“in the mine, your orifices are not used by strangers for masturbation.”

“I didn’t do it. Jay didn’t do it. Jane [Raskin] didn’t do it. Marty [Raskin] didn’t do it. Pat [Robertson] didn’t do it. We didn’t do it.”

I just find it so cruel, laws that affect women primarily are once again being spearheaded by old white men who constantly pay for sex, who don’t have a single moment of shame for their hypocrisy.
This is why I’m okay with the public shaming of these old assholes, I have no pity for anyone who has used their privilege…

Ooohhh...pretty colorful flowers like this are to me, the way shiny things are to other people (and birds). I want a cute summer dress with this arrangement all over it!

I had a bizarre memory experience this week where I stepped outside on a particularly hot, dry night and had a.. flashback?

omg! what an amazing story! WAY TO GO!!!

Happy Saturday, fellow Jez folks.

I’m 36 and barely use social media. I technically have FB, instagram and twitter accounts, but I don’t think I’ve posted anything to any of them in years. I will occasionally pop on FB to check out what pictures my brother has posted of my niece and nephew and will check Twitter during major news events, but I’ve come…