See...Apple.

I must be lucky. 4 VWs and never a single check engine light. Maybe I should start playing the lottery.

I honestly have never hated anyone as much in my fucking life. Literally everything he does wants me to punch a hole in the wall. His hand motions, the way he condescendingly looks down like “calm” when reporters are asking question, he’s muffin top build...everything about that man is punchable.

Just so we can get it out of the way and move on to other commentary:
Something something something liberals, politics on my car site, keep your politics to yourself, liberal media, MAGA, I’m unsubscribing from Jalopnik, give him a chance, but whataboutwhenObama..., blah blah blah etc

Easily the best suggestion in this thread. Long live the wagons.

Tossing this in the ring. Cool: mostly, but who else has a dad could do a massive burn out and then take his bike to the park.

Jalopnik and no wagon!?

If only we could find a car we knew his son would think is cool, that’s also fast and has a reliable toyota engine. How will we ever dream up such a car.

I think that’s pretty much the entire raison d’etre for hot hatches, no?

My SVX does have sort of a claim to fame.

Great post, Karen! Don’t forget, you’re also cooler than your son.

Flashpro got rid of that, at least on the 8th gens.

Hello, I am part of the Jalopnik circlejerk. Here to remind you of this:

If you’re that concerned about horsepower you can always slap a VTEC sticker on the side of the Civic to make up the horsepower difference.

Yes. 4 years later, after it has depreciated into my budget.

It gives you the power of the Civic Si without the limited-slip differential to put the power down, nor the upgraded brakes to slow you down after you one-wheel-peeled it too much on that backroad. More stress on the motor than it was tested to handle and throwing your powertrain warranty out the window for $695?…

Your estimate seems low.

I think a volunteer labor cost estimate is in order.

I didn't know that the Taurus SHO stock did 0-60 in 4.5 seconds and the 1/4 in 12.9 seconds stock..... Oh wait, it doesn't. The Chevy SS also weighs under 4,000lbs whereas the Taurus SHO weighs like 4,400lbs... Even without a proper manual there's no comparing a RWD Chevy SS to a FWD biased AWD Taurus SHO.