Eh, I don’t know. Monogamish could mean the occasional threesome, but that doesn’t mean hooking up with your buddies one on one.

Well, and how hard is it to just get some clarification at the initial invitation? I work in a very male-dominated field, and I had gotten the “clarify if you’re talking about drinks with a group or just us” thing down before I finished my second summer internship. After a couple ambush dates, you’ve gotta learn to…

1) It’s bad to leave relationships too early. No one wants to be flighty and bail at the first sign of hardship. And while marriage counseling can help save a relationship, the marriage counseling industry’s success is due in large part to people in incompatible couples needing to think that they tried everything…

“And I suspect, deep down, many of these people know it, too.”

That is what they’re wanting: Confirmation that breaking up is the best option. That dealing with the short term fallout is gonna be worth it in the end. It sounds easy when we’re on the outside looking in, but people are finicky and are more than one trick ponies. There’s a connection you develop in any relationship t…

I feel like I can always tell when Dan’s having a busy week because we start with a couple of “This relationship is destroying my sanity, I have no reason for optimism, and I/my partner can’t or won’t have an upfront discussion about it, but perhaps I should stay in it forever because it’s hard to admit to myself that…

True, if that’s how it went down then that’s not cool. I do wonder, though, if it’s more that he said something else tender that wishful/dickful thinking turned into an “I love you,” and that’s why he was trying to correct LW’s interpretation the next day.  

To be fair, while Roger isn’t a jerk for feeling what he feels, he is kinda a jerk for telling LW he loves him, then pulling a “I don’t know what you think you heard...” the next day. Doubly so given that LW had reacted poorly the last time Roger wanted to ratchet down the relationship. If you know that someone wants…

I don’t know poly mechanics enough to know how people deal with falling for someone maybe more than your primary partner, but he 100% sounds like he is in love and would trade everything else for this guy (as Dan noted, the other two are barely sketched out). I guess I’ve seen enough gay couples open up and then…

Yeah it’s great if everyone wants exactly the same thing and has time for that, but here’s a case where 3/4 people were apparently cool and one person is enough to ruin it. Then you end up having a break up while you’re still married? Part of the nice thing about being in a steady relationship is *not* having to feel…

with himself, maybe.

Precisely. “That dress you’re wearing was fine for when we were dating, but do you really want to show that much leg now?”

First, let me say that you have good taste in choosing hydrangeas. Second, know that you shouldn’t worry; plants really love it when you wet them. Nothing gets them in the mood quite like regular wetting. Finally let me say that you never have just one chance for polybotanamary

Dear Nobody,

Sure, one guy’s incompetence led to 200,000 people dying from a contagious virus that most definitely can’t be cured by bleach, and the other guy has stressed the danger of that virus and the importance of wearing a mask, but if you remove the 2 from 200,000 you get 00,000. That mean’s they’re practically the same!

When in doubt, I recommend avoiding crazy guys who condone white supremacists and have over a dozen rape accusations against them. But that’s just me. Since I am technically a media personality and am therefore obligated to give equal attention to both sides for some reason even though one is vastly worse than the…

You need someone who can mediate between your heart and brain. I recommend your wiener.

I’ve been getting hot and heavy with myself for many years now. Lately I’m worrying that it’s turned into a strictly physical thing, that my heart’s not really in it. I should probably have a conversation about it, but I’m afraid to bring it up with me. I don’t want me to leave me. Any advice?

Unfortunately, you can never underestimate the amount of idiots in the world.

I’m sorry, I know this question isn’t really in the spirit of Savage Nobody, but I’ve gotta ask: