Best comment EVER. You win.

I suppose he’ll be seen in every photo with his tongue sticking out for the next two years.

Maybe exclusively has sex to his own music.

Kanye has DEFINITELY had sex to his own music though.

Microwaves don’t kill people. Idiots who don’t know how to use microwaves kill people (or at least just annoy the hell out of them when the fire alarm goes off).

Are we sure it wasn't Ryan trying to heat up a cheesy pita?

With that orange coloring agent it must have looked like a duraflame log while it was burning

The one day Reggie finally listens to his coworkers and brings something other than leftover tilapia...

It’s a very real possibility, Pinkham. Those things are vicious brutes.

I can’t handle it. This made me laugh and turned my morning around.

I should not have laughed as hard at this as I did.

Sorry, sorry. BELEIBABLE #ForTheCanadians

believable

When I worked at the Irish pub (managed the awesome, baseball bat-wielding Sinead), some of our regulars were a couple with their seven-year-old son. They’d usually come in on the early side for dinner, and they were just lovely people. Their son, Jake, in particular, was delightful. After the parents placed their…

I know that it’s great to complain and god damn do we need to vent but it’s always awesome to read these.

Unexpectedly Great Restaurant Customer

• I had a table of like 15 come in once on one of my performance review days. I worked at this place where white trash people congregated (and I live in one of the whitest towns in the US- seriously) and this was a table of fifteen Native American looking people. I was actually pretty stoked -not to exoticize people or…

That Outback one still cracks me up.

Arbys: die full.