Holy shit you missed the best part. Quoting another story I read...this is shit that LaVar Ball ACTUALLY SAID...

I can’t find it in my heart to be mad about Hero Fest because I pulled a Hector from it. While I appreciate what Takumi can do, Hector is ludicrous - hits hard, ranged attacks get countered, and he’s hard to kill. That was my lucky streak of pulls though - got 5 star Nowi and 5 Star Tharja around the same time. Now…

I just pulled Lyn, she is pretty sweet. Not every character can be ludicrous like Hector or Takami. Her abilities are a bit odd though.

Note to self: add “Curt Schilling’s bankrupt ass” to Cards Against Humanity deck....

Classic.

I would have thought with your occasional Magic: the Gathering coverage you’d mention Pro Tour Amonkhet this weekend as well. Coverage is streaming on Twitch of the top 8 today.

So you’re really surprised?

How does one decent draft dictate the future of a NFL Franchise? Remember all of the “A” grades the Browns have gotten in years past.

Because “the future of a franchise” = “one NFL draft.”

This is the stupidest hot take ever.

Dear Mr. Burneko,

Now now, everyone knows that this was just a set-up for The Mighty Ducks 6: Beijing Bound, where a washed-up ex hockey coach leads a group of precocious Chinese kids (and one Korean who has Chinese citizenship and can’t stop farting) to their DESTINY.

Nonsense. You have obviously never read Jezebel. More crazy comments there than anywhere else (no, it’s not a woman thing either, I’m not a misogynist, there’s just cringe worthy stuff there usually posted by trolls)

Great stuff. If you have never watched Hokuto no Ken/Fist of the North Star, BTW, you have to search it out. It is a ludicrous series that has some ham-fisted storytelling and annoying characters...but you get through it because the protagonist can land a weird pressure point karate combo that makes the bad guy’s head…

It is a rare occasion where I want to see a kid cry, but man, those tears were DELICIOUS.

But you missed the bigger question: what is the monthly budget these men need to bottle their own farts for later sniffing? I hope it’s at least 30 grand, or they’re not paying the help nearly enough.

Hey Ethan, what’s the deal with Kona?

You are, but it’s EVIL Kona.

You doubled up on Kona, unless it’s Kona then Kona: Evil Twin with a Goatee edition.

That’s not nose picking, that’s DIGGING FOR GOLD, sir. ‘Snot a bad idea to look to your nostrils for inspiration when everything else goes wrong. THOSE BOOGERS DON’T LIE. (mostly because they can’take merely lie against the “real integrity” of a great finger).