Wow, I was not prepared for how not bad this was.

You can’t improve a song that shitty no matter what you do with it. It’s not worth it. Just sing it the normal boring way and don’t be slow and meandering because people want to see the damn cars turn left.

There are a lot of horrifying aspects of IBLP but here’s the one that, to me, best represents their insanity: IBLP women, like the Duggars, are expected to wear their hair long and curly (permed, if they don’t have naturally curly hair). Why? Because Bill Gothard thought women looked most beautiful with long, curly…

It’s not defending Kim though. It’s pointing out how men “discover” an activity women have been doing for years and mocked for it. Not only makeup but everything.

Oh for fuck’s sake. 

That’s not even her first Oscar film; she stole scenes in Hidden Figures, too.

The red carpet exchange struck me as much more of an “it’s loud and there are a bunch of people here, so I have to lean close to you and gesture so that you know where I’m going and where I’ll meet you” sort of conversation.

Um, so we don’t think that Ben was just super annoyed at the paps? I mean that look and “what the fuck” hand gesture pretty much tells that story. Leave these people alone on this whole “will they get divorced soon” thing. It’s like “when will she get pregnant? Is she pregnant?” Jennifer Aniston news. Just fucking…

considering Gen Z is currently in the phase of their lives where they don’t command a high salary, are saddled with student loan debt, and can’t say no to a $1 margarita.

(Realizes reading comprehension mistake. Tries to delete misinformed post to save face... gets Kinja’d.)

That’s the crazy thing about reading. You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. In fact, it takes active effort on your part to engage.

Then don’t click on links where celebrities talk about their sex lives. Self-control is the first step toward self-respect.

Look, I don’t know what almond  milk did to piss off Aubrey Plaza. I don’t need to know. I  just know that I don’t want to cross her, so now I hate it too

Your rate of shitposting on this site is pathological. Do you have a boring office job or are you a lonely retiree whose children won’t talk to him anymore?

While Where Is My Mind? works a little too well here, I imagine any song that begins similarly will have the same effect. Ice Ice Baby could potentially do the same, as could Can’t Touch This, although hopefully the beat would wake you before “Stop! Hammer Time” rolled around.

Tori Amos next please

It’s okay to think people are fucking weirdos for doing stuff like this in public you know.

Came to say the same. JFC, this site.

Weird that one of the links about websites using a pull quote as clickbait didn’t get posted, here I’ll list it:

I want slideout shelves for fridges. I said it. I stand by it.