This will always get a star from me.

These have become one of my favorite recurring articles, great job all around!

Max Headwound?

I was going to say the same thing.  Just atrocious form there.

This is the part where another commenter comments on the first comment and completely misses the point of the first comment.

KP: That someone first discovered vodka, cream, and tomatoes go together in a sauce is a miraculous discovery

I’m thinking about interviewing my 3 year old for my wife for Mother’s Day.  Any suggestions for questions that will likely yield hilarious answers?

Is the recurrence of this feature the official beginning of summer?

This is an eephus pitch of a joke. I was expecting one thing to happen only to be left staring mouth agape at the exact opposite having occurred. Bravo.

I speak jive.

Agreed. He did embellish it a bit, but I bet that hurt like a mother and he didn’t see it coming.

Your boxer shorts probably

I had managed to avoid it until Elvis Andrus made it his walk-up music this season.  As if being a Texas Rangers fan isn’t enough punishment...

Bloody shark, doo doo doo doo doo doo

The Mets may be 10-6 in the standings, but they will always be 0-16 in the hearts of baseball fans everywhere.

there isn’t a TV audience of tens of millions of people watching whenever he blows a line

God bless you for this. I was a kid growing up in Fort Worth in the 80s-90s and this commercial still holds a special place in my ear/heart, even if the Cowboys won almost as many games as the Mavs did back then:

“Herrera’s in a league of his own. Oh, sorry, I meant Herrera should still be in a league of his own.”

Always and forever 

If I may add two: