My first child was conceived while I was on the pill.

Related:

Ariana Grande's aesthetic is anything but sexy. She's a woman in her 20's trying to look like a baby prostitute. It's pretty disturbing, and also ironic that her aesthetic says "sweet" but her personality is anything but lol.

Remember the time like a year ago that Taylor Swift reacted to a pretty harmless joke from Tina Fey and Amy Poehler by telling Vanity Fair, "there's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women" and turned it into a whole deal everyone would have otherwise forgotten?

"And it wasn't even about a guy!"

"She did something so horrible," Swift says. "I was like, 'Oh, we're just straight-up enemies.' And it wasn't even about a guy!"

"...and it wasn't even about a guy!"

We need to address the common denominator here:

lorde would be on team tay

I hate when white people get new words. Now everybody is "shade-ing" everybody. Beyonce is giving shade to Rihanna. Bieber is giving shade to Bloom. I'm giving shade to Jezebel. When does it stop?

I'm on team Lorde, Robyn, or Adele.

Right? She is like the most passive aggressive bitch in the world! I was willing to shrug off all the kissing and telling, because basically any songwriter does that to some extent, but this is just beyond. Grow some balls, Tay, and settle your scores in person.

She probably means confrontation because she sure does love dissing people through song.

I'm not sure that hiring away three dancers is the same thing as trying to sabotage an arena tour. But I'm still team Taylor because I find her the less obnoxious of the two. That being said, now she's the one who escalated the situation and knew the internet would quickly be successful in determining who it was. So,…

you would not believe how much I hate conflict.

...which one is Betty?

This is some Betty and Veronica shit, and, for once, I'm rooting for Betty.

I expected them to have better taste in art.

Seems to me you'd need multiple spigots if you wanted to fill that thing any faster than [some time next week] but, sure, gimme. (And interesting is the putting up of mirrors in front of windows.)

I feel like it is both a staggering waste of water (and energy, since the water will need to be hot) and also the most wonderful thing I've ever seen in my life and I want it so much that the knowledge I'll never have it will haunt me for the rest of the week.