If a tree falls in the woods with no one around, does it have more mobility than Joe Flacco?

This is America. Of course it won’t.

Ronaldo didn’t score on purpose because he saw Bale standing right there and he didn’t want to celebrate with him.

3 am Saturday Morning.

What’s the Over/Under on how long it will take for Trump to attack Professor Clark on Twitter?

Well the Lions should be a sure win.............Wait, the Lions are 8-4 and in first place in the NFC North by 2 games?!?!?!?!?!? What the fuck?

Dances With Wolves taught me that shitty white people make the best Native Americans

The waiter at Olive Garden to refill his basket of endless breadsticks.

“But 👏 how 👏 is 👏 the 👏 dick?”

If those Trojan players had any sense of shame, they’d all agree to take a huge pay cut.

So angry

You’ve been very lucky with your bosses if this doesn’t ring true to you.

There was another broken Hart in front of England’s goal.

Jabroni is #10

Reached for comment, Kevin Love said, “I can’t really defend his firing. Or the job he did as coach. ...Actually, I can’t defend anything. Please don’t ask me to.”

Reached for comment, Cavs Superstar LeBron James said, “The team is going to miss Dave and all the hard work he has done. But I promise the city of Cleveland: we will not stop until we find an even more talented individual to serve as team waterboy for the rest of the season.”

Probably to cover up rape allegations.

a settlement that also requires the college to provide an undergraduate education to his 12 children

no....its my song

actually you didn’t write that song in the first paragraph it’s from the bible thats ephesians 7:16