Spending 80% of your life behind bars...what a waste. I guess that's one reason not to, you know, rape people.

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time Thank you, Lindy, for sacrificing your tastebuds for my amusement.

There's a reason this guy has a cat instead of a girlfriend.

Frankly, I think she won't answer the questions because her beliefs are at odds with her husband's — or at least with the views her husband asserts to the public.

I tried all of these, but I just can't get over Britney and Justin.

I do not understand the choice of photograph accompanying this article. From what I can see, it's a picture of Sean Connery, Anna Nicole Smith and Robin Williams (not so) lookalikes?

I'm going to pass on slathering borax all over my face, sorry.

Huh?

She'll get better. My girl is still crazy at 3, but she slowly started getting *less* crazy at around 1 1/2. Maturity depends on the type of dog, and some take up to 3 years. Just a waiting game. A really, really long waiting game.

Same point applies.

Good for them. Aside from the fact that a 20-something year old is totally allowed to have the time of his life, this enables me to enjoy semi-nude pictures of hot soldiers. HOLLER!

Despite being totally irrelevant to any topic of conversation EVER, Arianna Huffington is far from ugly. Extremely far.

PUPPPPPPY! Ugh, I sometimes think about how I'd love to get a puppy, and then I realize that my dog, who is 3 years old, is 10x less of a pain in the ass as she was when she was a puppy but still a huge pain in the ass.

I'm as anti-Mittens as they come, but...if a child is conceived during a rape, it IS a type of conception. So I don't see what the problem is, he's being consistent in his stance, at least.

I'm sorry, but there is no way that chick on the right is a good enough actress to be feigning shock at what Lochte is saying. Fake, my ass.

Wow, you went there. Good for you, I guess. Two wrongs make a right, apparently.

I thought Dee Snider was a hardcore Republican. I'm shocked he didn't approve of the use of the song.

You know you're fucked when even Ann Coulter is saying you should step down as a GOP candidate.

On a slightly different topic, I'm wondering why we expect Republicans to be okay with abortion in circumstances with rape. I mean, if they truly believe that abortion is the murder of an innocent child, isn't it still murder no matter how the child was conceived? Isn't it a little hypocritical of them to say,…

To be fair, Bachmann doesn't sound half bad given how stupid she usually is.