That literally doesn’t make it better or even ok. Women have the right to terminate pregnancies, wanted or unwanted in this country.

I can certainly understand that. When I moved to a larger city that had overall better mental healthcare support I went to one location to see a psychiatrist, therapist and primary physician. The doc actually only worked with mentally ill patients, but for all their medical needs so it was awesome. I liked my…

Have you found a new therapist?

Ugh! That’s such a gross inappropriate question for anyone let alone a therapist to ask! And dumb too because you don’t know the sex at that age. It always astounds me when seemingly smart people (which I assume therapists are given the schooling, but you know about assumptions) think that at all stages of development…

Oh I agree. He planned it. I’m fairly certain he’s done it to other women. I wish I’d been strong enough to report it right away but I couldn’t even acknowledge it and then he lived so far away. He’s every once and awhile texted, emailed or made a new profile on OKC to message me. I don’t read them. They get…

It was different circumstances. I didn’t really know him. We met on ok cupid, he lived several hours away. On paper, he seemed amazing. He was into social justice, understood feminist theories, had a sin around my son’s age so we could talk parenting. He was charming and witty and handsome. And he seemed to like me.…

I completely understand that feeling. I think I’ve processed the newest rape (man does it feel cruddy to write that) much better than the one with the ex for the very reason you state. He couldn’t have done it... Hopefully, that’s my next demon to conquer in therapy. (I love therapy. I recommend it all the time.…

The fact that I felt I had to minimize what happened and apology to him angers me to this day. Why is it worse for a man to be called a rapist WHEN HE IS ONE than for a woman to get raped?!

She sounds like the worst.

Wow. No where in my comment was I rewriting your history. You are allowed to define what happened to you in whatever way you want. And it’s great you are direct and blunt and only make friends who also are. It’s liberating to be able to speak clearly and understood.

I think they are compared because both involve kids (if you can call college students kids) and because they are both supposed to be educational centers. What makes the comparison interesting, is that most people know college tuition is very high but assume daycare to be affordable.

I really adore Obama too. I may not agree or approve of everything in his presidency but he comes across as a man that truly cares about other people. That we’re not just numbers and statistics to him. He reminds me of a cooler Jimmy Carter in that way.

I adore the Simpson’s and they absolutely (and sadly) nailed it.

He raped you. And unfortunately, I think that’s a very common rape.

I disagree. Saying it hurts is a clear indicator he should have at the very least stopped and asked her what was wrong. In all other situations we acknowledge that there are hard refusals and soft refusals. When someone is being forced to have sex against their will, saying “no” or “stop” should not be the only words…

That lady doesn’t know what she’s talking about. I mean, we know that. But even from the psychiatrist thing is wrong. Psychiatrists are medical doctors who focus on brain chemistry and medication. Psychiatrists don’t deal with the nitty gritty psychology.

This is not true in the slightest. You know why? Because men and women (boys and girls) are the same species. And we’re an evolved species so we can and do use our minds to think about things beyond procreation.

Your explanation reminds me of an article I read called schrodinger’s rapist.

Yes, yes, yes!!! This is EXACTLY how consent needs to be taught!

I’m mostly in agreement with you. But I’d like to point out there are lots of ways of saying “no” that don’t actually come out as n-o. I admit that it’s difficult for me to be direct with my boundaries but my rapist didn’t hear the no in “I don’t want to do this” and “what if we didn’t do this” after he cornered me…