Imagine your snark if they lost!

Paul is 32. Curry is 29. They gotta be born on the same day or something?

I started out pretty sure the Senators were going to score on some broken play and a soft-ish goal, but it soon became pretty apparent they weren’t going to get any sort of sustained pressure in the Pens’ zone.

Look, life ain’t that great. I’m 45 and if I got to call my shot, the Kate Beckinsale assisted suicide wouldn’t be the worst way to go.

I would like to point out here that Dario Franchitti was married to Ashely Judd and now he’s eating at Taco Bell with a married couple at 10 p.m. on a Sunday night. If that doesn’t speak to how far the man has fallen, I don’t know what does…

If you choose to watch playoff basketball instead of playoff hockey then you deserve this season

That’s the thing to remember about Francis… He’s on a mission from God!

Death comes in infinities.

I’m sad only because we won’t get to experience the joy of finding out he died ever again.

If Henry Kissinger can get it, anyone can.

Pretty sure it’s what those pussies from Cincinnati specify when they order a pastrami-fucking-sandwich.

Long live the early aughts astros

The series losses for the Caps in the Ovechkin era have gone 7, 6, 7, 7, 7, 4, 7, 7 and 7 games.

the funny thing is that he’s the one that’s in a short lived career. Fucking moron.

Okay, so are you ready for the punchline?

Who is Brian Decker?

I can understand this whiny oral history project bullshit this was Boston’s only basketball title, but the rafters seem to indicate the existence of a shitload of other titles, probably endlessly commemorated on a 24-hour New England channel that just shows slo-mo highlights.

ugh, this place has really humped the shark