Wun Wun is King Kong: huge and powerful, not very bright, and ultimately a tragic figure.

Ross is not being nice. He is being southern shady. See “bless your heart.”

If Ramsey flays and burns Dolorous Edd, I will magic myself fictional and strangle the bastard myself.

He is a narcissist. He believes the only people who don't love him are bad people. The definition of a bad person is someone who doesn't love him.

“John McCain” is the name we give the suit filled with decatuplets, each one of which has a vote. They take turns being the head.

When they make a Kardashian donut?

I would eat the hell out of those cupcakes. I would not eat the soap.

In other, equally exciting news I am finally winning my long battle against the hangnail on my left big toe.

At last, our long and grueling national nightmare is over.

Anyone who votes for Trump in the general should come out with a dunce cap instead of an “I voted” sticker.

I really need to up my adultery game if I expect compete with this and to fulfill my dream of having a lifetime movie made based on my life.

Is that the poster for the new movie “Two Plastic Guys and a Twink?”

Trump is the republican nominee for president. All rules of logic and reality have been suspended. Purple umbrella hurricane!

If you are buying those turtles on Canal street, I hate to break it to you, but they aren't meant to be pets...

You give us a Pygmy hog in one sentence, and take it away in the next. You are a cruel capricious Bob!

I look forward to getting my annual hoohah screening at the Trump Center for Blood Coming Out of Your Whatever. I assume it is where I will also need to go for my mandatory boob job, and that the fees will be sliding scale, based on hotness.

Clearly I need to find higher quality caffeine.

Thank you for the recommendation! Just purchased the e-book.

When Stannis is your dad, you are bound to be overly rebellious against authority figures.

It’s not really a conundrum. Or at least it should’t be. If we want to remain in power, we have to eat anything that threatens us. Otherwise, we’ll be on their menu.