I don’t want to burst anyone’s bubble, but what they’re describing in the patent reads as Rockstar’s solution for animation blending and procedural animation to replace NaturalMotion’s Morpheme (animation blending) and Euphoria (procedural animation synthesis) that they’ve used to date. I remember their job listings…

I would very much like it if the show’s narrative structure was very different from the game. I quite liked it (arse-numbing over-padded length not withstanding) but the way they laid out the story felt like the most boring way they could’ve implemented it in a videogame. I’ve always imagined they intended it as…

Does this mean we can start calling “California commons” “steam beers” again?

It’s also just as much of a sign of rushed artwork that’s been retouched by multiple artists and not properly given quality control time. I’ve seen enough in-production artwork in my career to know it’s possible, especially in outsourced assets.

Greenland is one of the most stressful movies I've ever watched, probably because I've got a couple young kids like the characters.

Jacques Servin of corporation-terrorising performance art/ comedy collective The Yes Men caused Maxis to miss the Christmas release window for SimCopter, which got him sacked. This was because an Easter Egg he added to periodically spawn a “himbo” character every few hours, which would kiss other himbo characters and …

The gun automatically turns off the ammo counter after about a minute of inactivity. You absolutely do not need to take the batteries out every time and I've no idea why you've said you do.

No! I want someone on the production feeding Kojima Red Bull and encouraging his every most self-indulgent instinct. I want Hollywood to spend two hundred a fifty million dollars making and marketing a movie so obtuse, it stops halfway through and the projectionist isn't allowed to start up until the audience scores…

Yeah, during the Codec calls.

Only if there’s a post-credits scene where Master Onion walks into a dive bar where a left-handed guitar-playing lamb is packing up her gear.

I miss the thing in Metal Gear Solid 2 where you can press R1/ R2 while someone else is speaking, and Snake/ Raiden’s inner thoughts are revealed. Pressure sensitive too, so you could really put the boot in or just make a bemused noise.

This gives me fond memories of the Windows 98SE desktop theme that Konami released around the time MGS2 was ramping up for launch.

So glad you mentioned Godzilla! Does anyone like Brain Stew by Green Day if it doesn’t have Godzilla shouts in it any more?

It's Sir Lenny Henry! Henry Lenny indeed.

I seem to remember Alan Wake on PC was fine... if you had a fairly decent multicore CPU. That wasn’t a given when it came out. High-end single- or dual-core CPUs often struggled with it. I had a fairly budgets quad-core setup that managed fine, I knew people with really good dual-core CPUs who couldn't play it for…

I think you’re grossly underestimating the state of the art in playability data analysis. Detecting something as trivial as a script that nudges you around a few simple activities was a solved problem ten years ago.

It'd be trivially easy to spot the players using the exploit via the playability analytics the game will be sending back to the mothership. I'd really recommend people avoid using it as they'll probably get a swift ban from online play.

You use the same vehicles and upgrades in both. I can see why they did it, so the entire online experience isn’t just chock full of people blasting around in $15mil fully upgraded megacars from day 0.

Sometimes the only mask they have in the mask store is “uncircumcised penis”.

I thought it was a matter of public record that Hitler had only one ball; the other, famously, is in the Albert Hall.