You think Hulk Hogan is the kind of narcissist to watch himself on television? Shame on you BROTHER!

Well BROTHER Keith, that was good television. Now of course there has been better, like every episode of Tough Enough featuring Hulk Hogan, on the WWE Network. Watch me critique a bunch of JABRONIS and one hot chick. And I ain't talking about Paige, because she's British and they aren't real Americans BROTHER (and…

Not really DUDE. Paige has set herself up as the Simon Cowell of the group because she hates everything. Daniel is Paula Abdul because he loves everything. I of course am Randy Jackson because I have the most talent, everyone loves me, and I'm loveable and huggable BROTHER

BROTHER, these PUNKS aren't marky enough. They should be freaking out every time they see me. They should be kissing my feet. In fact I may make that a new challenge. Whoever kisses my feet the worst gets eliminated.

WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING MICHAEL COLE, I can't remember the last time someone so unnecessarily focused on a car BROTHER. Back when I owned the WWF and booked all the matches I never would have done something like that BROTHER. Michael Cole, you are just some JABRONI who realized early that your frosted tips…

Max Landis! He's my BROTHER, BROTHER!

Take your meds Flair

Blackman's more of a Rent-A-Fence kind of DUDE

Stop being such a prude VIKING BROTHER!

WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING BROTHER! That Summer Rae and Lana angle, that's some good stuff right there! I'll tell you back in the glory days of my career DUDE when me, Vince Russo, and Bob Mould were writing the greatest literature ever made we would have killed for material like that! CHICKS catfighting…

Ric BROTHER, Killer Mike is calling. He wants his childhood back

American in the only language that matters BROTHER. John Cena is fooling the American audience by not telling them their language is the best in the world DUDE *shot put*

American in the only language that matters BROTHER. John Cena is fooling the American audience by not telling them their language is the best in the world DUDE *shot put*

Hulk Hogan reviews RAW: I will destroy you Zeus! SHOCKER BRAH!

THE IMMORTAL ONE IS PERMANENTLY EMPLOYED BY RENT A FENCE BROTHER

What you don't know BROTHER is that on the streets they call me Mass Transit!

I think I left a world title at your home BROTHER. It says Hulk Hogan in big letters. I know it says "The Rock" too but you can't just tape names over things AMIGO. I'm going to send Ed Leslie to get it. You think you could return that to me DUDE? You know, considering the whole "I'm the greatest of all time thing"?

Get out BROTHER. This is my house

Uhhhhhh The Hulkster didn't watch Raw this week BROTHER. But he did watch the 3rd Survivor Series where he trounced everyone BROTHER.

*This is Terry Bollea right now*
Dusty was one of the most amazing wrestlers of all time and to see him go is truly a tragedy. The world lost a big chunk of positivity and it will be hard to ever replace it. R.I.P. Dusty Rhodes