They look exactly like the type of people I would have thought run Whole Foods.

I was distracted by the containers of fruit behind him. New slogan idea? “Whole Foods - For people too lazy to cut their own fucking fruit.”

But how will I fell superior to people if I can’t shop at Whole Foods? :(

Everyone calls it Whole Paycheck. No one calls it Whole Check except for Jezebel.

Look at this stupid asshole.

If they pulled that shit on this Paris, they’d be dead by now

Either way, Nicole Richie is having a laugh.

if Paris was really on a prank, she needs an Oscar. if not, her people will be fired

known for harboring particular concern for the environment or establishment medical practices

I don’t even get what the stock photo is supposed to be about. A crying 5 year old? Kids that age cry, whether or not they’re vaccinated. Is he supposed to look autistic or filled with toxins or something?

You’re actually dead now and commenting from the ether. - Jim Carrey

Please let there be lawsuits.

Yeah, I remember a lot of stories here on Jalopnik of mechanics that seriously said, “You really need to get your brakes done,” and customers leaving in a huff just to low their vehicle into a utility pole across the road.

Haha, obviously you have never worked in the auto service industry. I had a doctor with a 750 that would only replace tires once they wouldn’t hold air. A doctor. There are a lot of stupid, irrational and crazy people in the world. Most everyone here has a car, which means at somepoint they will come into the shop.

This happened to me in Texas. I took my ‘02 Focus SVT across the street from work to have my brakes checked. Seemed like one of the rotors was warped. They called me not even an hour later and said I needed a complete brake overhaul to the tune of $600. They also told me I couldn’t take the car as it was unsafe to…

I yearn for the day that this happens to me so I can tell them to go fk themselves... WHY WON’T IT EVER HAPPEN!!?!?!?!?!

Libertarians are just urban conservatives that want to get laid. If you’re a young close minded freak show living in Seattle, Portland or Los Angeles you don’t say that you’re conservative. What you say that you’re a libertarian. I’ve worked with guys like this and it’s hilarious how they contort themselves. I want to…

A friend did his bachelor party in the Ukraine and apparently an add on to the travel package was a fake kidnapping. A groomsman signed them up for it but did not disclose to anyone else. They got snatched off the street by men with guns, thrown in the trunks of cars, driven over some bumpy roads for what seemed like…

This isn’t funny at all. You don’t do this shit.