Take the red pill and wake up an angry virgin

Robert Downey Jr. is doing okay

Yeah, Chance is coat-tailing on the AV Club's popularity and definitely not the other way around

Sock it to me!

The nerd whining started with the cast announcement, the movie's actual quality was beside the point

"The (bad job reports) were phony in the past but (the new good numbers) are very real now."

This one is going to confuse the internet- do they cheer the atheism even though it stars a "female"?

Paul Shaffer is a talented musician. He plays Paul Shaffer's terrible songs very well.

TPS reports

The other women must have been relieved. They got to be in sketches!

Jesus, play it cool, man

Suddenly Sauron
Is flying above me

To be fair, it's not easy creating a health care plan that will help poor white people while screwing over minorities without outright saying "whites only". But that's plan B.

Oh shit, Rich Little is still alive

White guys have just been especially awful lately. I'm happy to take a seat and support other voices right now. And Colbert is basically my voice.

Trump supporters don't care about hypocrisy. Liberals lost, Trump can fill his cabinet with Goldman Sachs execs for all they care. (So he did.)

Things have gotten so shitty that I find it harder to enjoy middle aged white guys doing political humour (and I'm a middle aged white guy.)

Will a Funko Pop Figure collector ever be president?

Yeah, it says "I know nothing about this topic but I'm going to stink up the comments with a shitty reference anyway". Maybe move on to a topic you're actually interested in?

The whole Bleachers album is really good