“’Set and forget’ investing isn’t sexy, but it works*.”

While we’re recreating feasts from the middle ages, let’s remember that the food in the middle ages pretty much sucked. Burnt meat, no spices, coarse bread with bits of millstone.

The California Avocado Commission is going to recommend the safest way, not the most effective. Everyone knows: avocados are perilous.

I got good at scooping. Also, I like to scoop then do horizontal slices so I get larger avocado shaped slices that stay on sammiches better. Because other than sammiches, why are you slicing your avocado like that?

You’re having a hard time with this. If you don’t have the point balance in your account to begin with, you can’t do what’s in the article. It only works if you have a balance. If you have this card you will have a point balance at some point in which case the math does not lie. Always use your points for a statement…

If it’s someone to whom you’d loan money yourself and trust to pay you every month for five years. That’s the only circumstance in which I would consider co-signing. I don’t think it’s ever a good idea.

Sadly for me, I have a family member who is addicted to Judge Judy and other judge shows. One of the most common themes in the TV court is “I co-signed for him and he’s not making the payment so I want off the loan.” They just can’t comprehend life when the judge tells them that that is the polar opposite of how…

Why would anyone be anti-mayo? The shopping list above has eggs and olive oil on it. That’s all mayo is.

LOL, I would call Hot Dog what country music sounds like to a drunken Brit that has never listened to country music in his life :)

No, musicians have always been exploited by the record companies. See my post above for the explanation of how this came about. The record companies hold the carrots. This system persists because of that carrot, the billion selling #1 radio hit that turns you into a Bieber or Swift. No matter how much the rest of us…

Poor little rich girl Taylor Swift, eh? Let me explain this to everyone. The real message here is this:

I would like an article like this but with expressions that are mainstream today but were sexual in origin. “Bang for the buck” and “shot my wad” are two I can think of.

Classifying a band as part of a “genre” is for modern pop. What was Led Zeppelin? They were a fucking rock band. Is Battle of Evermore a rock song? No. If a band did an album of stuff that sounded like that they’d be labeled folk. If someone did a whole album of stuff like The Crunge off Houses of the Holy they’d be…

starstarstarstarstarstarstarstarstarstarstarstarstar

I read this in Manny Delgado’s voice.

You make a point with your crotch napkin, however I don’t really want to see you food/wine/lipstick/snot covered napkin while I’m eating. Honestly I think most people put them on their thigh or knee, but I’m going to cram mine in my crotch from now on and smirk mysteriously about my special secret.

Thank god you give enough of a fuck about this for both of us (a few times over) because I just can’t be bothered with bullshit rules that exist solely to justify that air of superiority some people seem to need.

I used to use harnesses because my dogs always pulled. Then last dog I got the trainer said, “don’t use a harness, use a regular collar, it helps them understand the consequences of pulling.” I went to regular collars and my dog is SO much more well behaved. Probably not just because of the collar, I’m always trying…

The thing on pinch collars...I don’t use them but no responsible and reasonably competent dog trainer would advocate using pain as correction. Pinch collars pinch. They are meant to get the dog’s attention and remind him/her not to pull on the leash. If you have not successfully taught your dog to walk nicely without…

I would slit my wrists.