“Bucket got nacho cheese ALL OVER the fan in front of us’ jacket. Not wanting to admit his fault, Bucket waited until the next play worthy of celebration and jumped onto the fan’s back, hands full of napkins to clean up the cheese.”

Pipe - “Submariner"

Why...why...why...why do I read PFT comments on this issue, any issue related to President Bankruptcy, or anything involving racism? What is inside of me that longs to observe the American Whitus Gullibulus Dumbfuckus in its native cyber-environment?

Diagonal parking spaces and never more than 2 checkouts open. Fuck Publix.

^^^this guy sexualizes children, everyone^^^

That ATL/DET game, jesus. I watched that with my father-in-law (born and raised in Monroe County, and never leaving it) and he was so outraged by the ending that he proceeded to get much drunker than usual. That culminated in a giant Kaepernick-related screaming match in my living room roughly 4 hours later. He didn’t…

“Price point” isn’t much different than “resiliency”, a (non)word that all sports talking heads (and Drew) like to use. The correct word is “resilience.” 

I lived in Gainesville for 4.5 years in the early part of this century, and have *zero* recollection of Jaguars presence, marketing, or fandom in any form whatsoever. Gators, *steeeeep drop-off*, Bucs, Heat, Braves, Dolphins. Jags? No. Hell no. HamNo.

Hey! Speaking as a guy with the lifelong nickname of “Nads”...I say swing ‘em if ya got ‘em.

Serious question — how many times has Jon Gruden ordered Hooters as takeout?

*LARGEST JACK-OFF MOTION TO DATE*

this description is accurate to a PFT

Motherfucker looks like Corey Feldman suffering from chronic Bitter Beer Face.

When you’re right, you’re right. And you, you’re always right!

No, that’s fair. I doubt they were lecturing on Return of the Jedi in that course. Still, to this day, I laugh in her face about it.

A lady I work with thought Spaceballs *was* Star Wars. Like, for real. She didn’t know there was an actual, non-comedy/spoof of it. She was well into her 30s before she realized Barf, Dot, Yogurt and the rest were a parody of another film series known collectively as Star Wars.

At what level *don't* those things happen? 

football games

Flutie briefly attended Hoover Jr. High in Indialantic, FL (where I attended 9th grade 20 years later). He came to some party for the school with his wife and couldn’t have been nicer. This would’ve been 1996 or so, so he was dominating the CFL at the time. Me and two buddies approached him to talk about the BC…