Mar-a-lago. Trump would throw out the first pitch and that level of physical activity might be the end of him. At the very least, he would probably crap his pants. Either way, I’m happy.

Let’s not get crazy here. 

These liberal Democrat shooting victims were very, very rude to me. Tremendously rude. I came all the way to Toledo to visit them and they wouldn’t even let me in their hospital rooms, which were very shabby by the way. Sorry, but it’s true. These rooms were terrible. Just these little white boxes with twin beds that,…

Is this usually how it goes down on those reality shows about the wives of people who do interesting things professionally?

Ok, fine. Let’s do nothing. Creating better and more responsive institutional systems is just a waste of time until humanity is perfected. Cool story, bro.

One imagines a new governing body would replace it with new by-laws, new directors, new sponsors, etc. 

It literally doesn’t matter because there is no evidence that he committed his crime to advance a political agenda nor is there any evidence the Elizabeth Warren or whoever is enflaming violent tendencies of unhinged people who may share her political worldview.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: This idiot’s…

People keep assuming the youngs (the oldest millennials are nearly 40, can we drop that term already?) don’t go to places like Hooters because the kids today are “are painfully aware of how exploitative” they are. Can I offer another, simpler explanation: When you came of age in the era of PornHub, a girl in shorts…

True story: I once went to Hooters by myself for lunch because I like wings and was nostalgic for their 3 Mile Island sauce as I remembered it from college. Turns out, the sauce wasn’t as good as I remembered and I should have going to BWWs, but that’s not the point of my story.

And with that, we can end this conversation confident there is no evidence to suggest the Dayton attack was motivated by his political ideology or spurred on by the words and actions of politicians.

If you read those words as a call for, as you put it, a “communist revolution” then your brain is made of sawdust.

Ok. Let’s play this game right now, so we can get it over with.

Yes, the Dayton shooter’s social media posts were politically progressive. But that is irrelevant because—and I will revise this take if new information is presented—there is no evidence that his terror attack was politically motivated. If may have been an…

I haven’t met anybody who is truly shocked at swearing--really. They are really only shocked on behalf of other people. - Stephen Fry

The MIL uses her phone in speakerphone mode almost exclusively. She’s also convinced Amazon and the CIA are spying on her. I think they, like the rest of us, can’t help but overhear her phone conversations. 

I like that they are attempting to build a viable editorial product *and* a viable business model. Compared to the legacy media conglomerates attempting to trash both and delusional start-ups bleeding VC cash and foundation grants until they can find a new scam, the Athletic is a God damn beautiful thing.

This is like saying “Those who sympathize with heavy metal music but who deplore loud noises...”

White nationalist ideology exists to be violent. 

Truly, comrade, you shall retire to the finest dacha.

TRUMP: All in all, I enjoyed my visit to Toledo and would recommend visiting it again in the future.

TEACHER: I thought you went Dayton.

TRUMP: Yeah, Dayton, that’s what I meant.

“normal spectrum of human despair”

It comes from love. #VisualizeAngels