Either that, or I’m a cytopathologist who recognizes that cutting funding to Planned Parenthood has consequences beyond fewer abortions.

Racist.

Pretty wild that Stormfront can’t find a single fucking grammar nazi.

You know what else got started on a Thursday? A terrible NFL tradition.

I have some buzzwords that describe you: dipshit, .8 % condom breakage, 336th trimester abortion, sparsely attended funeral, the guy that a Papa Johns driver checks on to see if he’s still alive but remembers that he’s an asshole that doesn’t tip so he leaves him to die with the band of his Trump underwear around his…

nah

Hey Russell, here’s an idea to avoid ties. Throw for a fucking touchdown.

The only Jalop Grandma pics are these from 1922 and 1924 of my grandparents....

It’s “It’s.” :)

They both beat:

Why is it always the Chicken Hawks and draft dodgers who talk so tough about military service they know nothing about?

America truly is a great country. The Deadspin staff’s new ambition is for Tomi Lahren to disembowel us.

At the very least we should send them a nice gift basket.

-Well, I had to google Cyanide and Happiness. Link to the the comic when you accuse somebody of stealing a joke!

It’s like taking Simms off the air would be an acknowledgement that CTE is real.

It was called “Mechanical Engineering” and was staffed by a bunch of odd looking people more than likely.

There’s a strong intersection between the type of dude who wants a brown turbo diesel manual wagon, and the type of dude who would fly 5000 miles on a whim to see a woman he’s only texted.

When [Modest Mouse lead singer Isaac] Brock left the scene he backed into a cop car, but he just drove off. Sometimes life is okay.

Is this the first time Carmelo has defended anybody?