I confess I love Curtis for a boy cat but mostly because I used to catsit for a Curtis who was the coolest cat (that wasn’t mine) I’ve ever met. So, Curtis the Second is a name I’d also be down with. I had a friend name his fish Phillip, he was very proud of that name :)

Aw, those are good names! And Lana with the huge paws and the brains - perfect. Do you ever yell at her like Archer? Lana, hey Lana, Lana-LANAAAAAAA!!!

It’s not for me to ask how they arrived here. As long they allow me to serve them, and destroy all their enemies, I don’t care.

Yes, cats were absolutely domesticated to guard human food. That’s it!

I don’t know, I sort of think that women have a responsibility to not put themselves into the sort of situation where this might occur. Which, apparently, involves building some sort of solitary subterranean bomb shelter and just living there for the rest of your lives.

even amidst my staggering flummoxation, i have to admit, that color is gorgeous.

Oh my god will you people shut the fuck up and give it a rest? “Insufferable?” They make minor headlines about 2-3 times a year. If you truly find them insufferable, it’s because you clicked the link looking for a reason to parade the giant stick stuck up your ass.

In rebuttal:

I’m sure the same people are falling over themselves to give to the Komen foundation, which mostly exists to keep itself in existence.

Trump is going to win this election on false equivalencies.

Take heed, children: if you want a cookie, don’t try and sneak your hand into the cookie jar; just stuff your entire head into the cookie jar and wear it for a helmet, and people will just keep giving you larger cookie jars to see what you look like bobbing around under them.

“The closeted perv has never come out as gay”

Because he very well may not be; being a child predator /= gay. Abusive sex is about power, not identity.

I love this tweet.

1. Go to vet school

Oh, and I want to add that I mean no disrespect to SAHMs. My point is that his target audience is likely not as invested in full parental leave for both parents. “Make America Great Again” means “The 50's were a swell time. Let’s do it that way again.”

Smashing the patriarchy is my #1 vagenda item all day err day!

“There’s a lot of women out there that demand that the husband act like the wife...”

lenny’s last fuckable day is defined not so much by the length of his life, but of yours.

I want Rita Wilson to understand that it’s Tom and me, not Tom and I.

“...it always has to come in jokes”