Our president is perfectly happy with smearing the name of a murdered journalist in the interest of maintaining lucrative weapons contracts

My daughter showed me the other day that Goofus and Gallant are dealing with things like posting personal information online.  

I mean... with Pence in the picture, there is always the chance it could be.

also this:

I half expected this sophomore-level writing project to end like

“It could be worse” is probably the least comforting thing you could say to me right now.

SO WHAT IF YOU’RE PARALYZED FROM THE NECK DOWN.

I love historical reminder non-sequiturs like this. To be perfectly honest, I’d take a massive volcanic eruption if it temporarily delays global warming. Granted, nothing would grow. But a few years of dystopian depression kind of appeals to me today.

Sorry, gots to disagree. In terms of human survival, both personal and as a species, 2018 has it over 536 AD, absolutely.

Counterpoint: 536 AD didn’t feature a man-child with nuclear weapons and a Twitter feed constantly causing concern that his next tantrum could end all life on Earth.

Trump/Pence 2020: “Hey, at least it ain’t the literal fuckin’ Dark Ages!”

So 536AD would have been the real world’s equivalent of the Long Night.

I’m going to make a bold hypothesis here and say that living in Europe the height of the Black Plague from 1347 to 1351 was a real downer time to be alive as well.

in the mid-6th century, a huge volcanic eruption in Iceland led to a massive ash cloud across the entire Northern Hemisphere, which in turn led to a dramatic drop in temperatures, which in turn led to crop failure and widespread starvation. A few years later, the bubonic plague hit the Roman Empire.

Shockingly off-brand for Splinter (until the last sentence.)

I forget where I first read it, but whoever said “Trump drinks water like Gollum eats fish” is brilliant.

I don’t know why anyone’s surprised—this was the purpose of the whole campaign as far as Trump is concerned. He has been very open about the fact that he planned to take political donations and launder them through his campaign by using vendors owned by the Trump Organization in order to make a profit, and it’s not…

I read the last paragraph, and now all I can think of is...

I’m right there with you.  I’m admittedly not on the leading edge of the music industry, but this guy’s existence is a mystery to me.

Except sadly, as people convicted of a felony, they can’t be hired as firefighters once they get out.  This is the face of modern day slavery in America.