“A Mysterious Slime Has Come For Washington D.C.”

I clicked on the Page Six item. Chelsea Clinton watched the Beyonce documentary on Netflix, with her husband. She also recently gave birth to her third child. Chelsea wanted her husband to give her a better reaction than Jay-Z did to Beyonce about her weight loss. Chelsea said this in an interview, about a conversation…

Look, I am 100% for people (re)discovering their faith. But when I listened to this album it really confirmed for me what I’ve suspected for a while now regarding Ye’s own “born again” path. It’s the path that people at their lowest find, and it fills them with so much euphoria that they just go headfirst in, not even…

They’re waging a war on our family and culture.

Jail time? Is that joke. Who are you? Marie Antoinette wanting to jail the peasants for eating your cakes?

Jail time for whom? You wouldn’t usually hold the housekeeper responsible, because she turned it in to management under their rules. A reasonable person would assume management would then follow the law to try to return the item to the owner. 

I think it’s just a way of wording it to indicate that she was the one assigned to clean up after her. It’s not a criminal conspiracy to describe trash and other things you leave for cleaning staff to take care of, even if accidentally, to be described as “left for cleaning staff”. I’m hesitant to police the language …

This was like eating a whole sheetcake with extra frosting.

Also, tell all of that to Tamir Rice, Buffoon Sanders.

BUT HE MARCHED WITH MLK!!! Ugh why why why do they keep pushing this fool down my throat?!

Bernie “I definitely don’t want black people to vote for me” Sanders

The thing is, it’s really impossible to erase that power dynamic from the relationship. If I, your boss, ask you to unload the dishwasher in my capacity as your significant other, it’s just not feasible for you to somehow not know that I’m your boss before you decide to point out that you’ve unloaded the dishwasher…

Darling... Your passionate analytics and seamless integration of sustainability and storytelling help me to downsize my enterprise. The knowledge you bring of offshoring opportunities, data mining collaboration and scalability pushes me to think outside of the box.

Alcohol is not an excuse. I have been a heavy drinker ever since I was legal—and only recently managed to cut alcohol out of my weekday.

Even at my worst, I never tried to grab, kiss, or otherwise physically/sexually assault someone.

Alcohol doesn’t make you do anything you wouldn’t do otherwise; it’s an inhibition…

....that’s what you took away from her babble? 

I hope he sues the living shit out of this school. The idea that telling someone not to call you a name is a fireable offense if the most idiotic thing I have ever heard and they are not qualified to teach brine shrimp much less children.

“Cher tells unjustly fired school guard: I got you, babe” would also score the points.

If you google Cher this is the top “news” story:

Weird that this article doesn’t mention anywhere that Trader Joe’s shoppers are actually required to buy one of those little packs of dark chocolate peanut butter cups they sell at the cash register. It’s a weird rule, but who am I to question it?