And me thought me had problems with grammar!

They have a goddamn bowling alley in the basement. Why would you ever leave the house?

That’s nothing. During pregame warmups, Newton was heard telling his teammates, “Time to fire up the Hindenburg!”

Thoughts and prayers to Blair Walsh.

The ball clearly brushed the ground when Hilton hit the turf. No catch.

that would be work.

Yeah, I have to say, that monologue was terrible. Not a single joke, hell not even a moving picture, just the text “The uploader has not made this video available in your country.” I mean, can we even call that a monologue, then? Larry David definitely dropped the ball here.

If you are ever in St. Louis, try Imo’s, Domino’s thin crust is an imitation of it.

Would be nice if you at the very least paraphrased the joke instead of making me have to watch what you just described as a lousy set to get some idea of what was so outrageous about the joke

Sure, but just you wait, Trump is going to make the biggest, most beautiful foreign policy mistakes you’ve ever seen!

“Well, we stayed up all night but it was worth it.”

- said no one after eating Papa John’s

Well, the owner of the company is a mouth breathing racist and all-purpose bigot, so you can keep not eating it

The thing that hurts me most about Papa John’s, I mean aside from their pizza, is that they used to serve crunchy, fresh and tasty pepperoncini peppers with their pies. Now, even those are depressing to look at, like they’ve been out of the jar for at least a week and run through the dishwasher.

Not water though. That shit’ll kill you.

Obviously this

Like a Harvey Weinstein of the future. The future of Space(y).

The sun was brighter. The grass was greener. Food tasted better.

Yay, murderous tyrants!

Fuck this stupid rube.