Eeeeehh it's not the worst idea I've heard. It would be especially good on freeways on the backs of semi trucks, like a directional light that you can only see when you're in the trucker's blind spot. But if it lit up in slower traffic we'd all see me on the evening news, half-naked, foaming at the mouth and digging…

Now, I'm sure many of you have just completed a vigorous, protracted spit-take and are now wiping the coffee/gin/Yoo-Hoo from your monitors. A stop light. Not a brake light. Keep in mind, there hasn't been a new innovation in taillight function since 1986's Center High Mount Stop Lamp — and I'm sure all of you…

Feel like the Viper should be on here, at least an honorable mention under the Cobra

GUYS. GUYS I'M OVER IN EUROPE RIGHT NOW AND THERE ARE SO MANY YETIS. THEY'RE REAL.

This is exactly the kind of review I want about cars, especially things like the Chrysler 300 that I didn't realize can do my favorite thing very well. Good job.

The Ford Probe was ugly. In name and appearance. It will always be ugly in every way.

I loved mine. Just got out of it and into a BRZ... Wanna buy another 318?

If they don't have an M car, they will make it look like one, and brag about all the upgrades that make it faster than an M car. The biggest bullshit on the planet.

They drive some of the slowest, ugliest, heaviest, most outdated vehicles on the road but constantly feel the need to let everyone know how "great" they are. "Oh, but they're cheap, parts are plentiful and they are easy to fix" No. They suck. You're just too poor to afford anything nice. Get over yourselves.

I really don't think it does at all. And their reputation is even more locked in than Cadillac's was, to the point that I kinda doubt they could change their image even if they started making huge changes.

I just don't see a Buick hot hatch doing well. No matter what they do, most people see them as boring old person cars. No one that wants a Buick wants a hot hatch. No one that wants a hot hatch wants a Buick. I feel like it'd go the way of the Merkur. Just slap an ugly bowtie on the front and show me a Chevy I'd…

TOUCH IT. TOUCH IT HARD.

That works just as well. You can be Forrest Whitaker, I'll be Jude Law, lets get us a Tuareg and get to work.

Don't worry, when I get one it's turning into a Jurassic Park truck. Now I must go and rob many banks.

Were I in the market for a sedan, I'd be all "WOOOOOOOO"

"Scariest ski slope", huh? I don't know about that. Gonna need to do some testing. A lot of testing. Aaaaaaaaand now I wait for next season, NOT EASY TO DO hahaha.

And with no SRT brand to exist anymore, that leaves the Artist Formerly Known as the SRT Viper without a home. Thankfully, Chrysler is welcoming back the Viper into the Dodge fold. Even if it isn't selling well, there is still a refresh planned for mid-year 2015. Hopefully this reignites the flame under the storied…

Or better yet, get her into tinkering with some vehicle, too. MORE OF US! MORE OF US! Mwahaha.

The Only Time

The Kia Track'ster is mine: 250hp AWD 3 door hatchback. To be more general though, anything like this. A small, affordable, lightweight, manual hatchback with all wheel drive. The only car that seems to promise anything remotely close is the new Renegade.