True story: my grandparents met at a malacology convention, fell in love, and got married. One year, for their anniversary, my grandfather named a new species of snail after her. I love your hobby.

Only one suggestion: don’t go to a movie with your ex.

Not that money is everything, but if you do any of those things, you’ll always be broke. And I don’t mean “not rich,” I mean pretty well close to destitute. I’m grateful there are folks willing to make such sacrifices (including several members of my family who have worked for non-profits their whole life), but I’ve…

Presenting a new sleepwear line from Rihanna: Airy Olas!

Totally. They’re monarchy’s answer to “Freedom Fries.”

That’s Rembrandt Peale’s “Porthole” portrait of GW. Never been my favorite. This is the better one Peale did of Washington, which hangs in the Old Senate Chamber. His father’s portrait of Washington as general is a classic too.

Sweet kicks, nana.

Yep, “Windsor” is an acronym for Saxe-Coburg-Gotha.

I’m laughing so hard my dogs are barking at me.

I want to make the outro of “ah-hoo-hoo-hoo” my ringtone.

Without dryer sheets, what would college kids stuff in their paper towel tubes to keep them from getting busted?

This article would fascinate my wife.

97% of the words that come out of my mouth between the hours of 7 AM and 11:18 PM are on the list above or in the comments.

YES.

Did you just ask a complete stranger to smell your finger? Don’t drink and drive.

Grease mode.

I’m certain I know your nephew. Don’t tell him I cuss while making Jezebel posts.

Tough to say too much without doxing myself — there aren’t many of us!

Professional numismatist here with some insight into the behind-the-curtain bullshit that goes into commemorative coin legislation: betcha anything that money ends up getting re-routed to Komen at some other time as a sneaky amendment on a transportation bill or something. The profits on coins like these (the…