Cakes made for weddings that aren’t open to natural procreative activities are just offensive.

The decision is the victory, the money is just the icing on the …oh, nevermind.

It Zagreb for money, nothing more. If he has to Split from the team, so be it, but he should just Pula his big boy pants up and play, or else he Rijeka a big mistake.

I can’t comment on Eat, Pray, Love (didn’t read it, don’t plan to), so all those comments declaring it worthless claptrap may be accurate, but I’ve spent some time with Elizabeth Gilbert in a casual setting and have to say I was pretty impressed with her: genuine, kind, funny, someone most people would enjoy hanging…

The main street in the SC town I live in was named Booth Street until the early 1920s — that’s right, it was named for the guy who assassinated Abraham Lincoln. The city hall is still on Confederate Street, which deadends into Confederate Park, where you’ll find memorials to the blacks who helped the Confederate cause…

There are a lot of us in South Carolina who would gladly take a flamethrower to every publicly visible CSA banner in the state. Come visit. We can giggle at the rednecks together.

“I identify as wealthy, now where are my coins?!”

He’s making it known he’d prefer to be #2 in the order.

ABC = Athlete’s Balls and Cock

There is a team for people like him.

This is pretty spot-on. The UWS is where wealthy people live because they like it, the UES is where wealthy people live because they feel like anywhere else would be beneath the dignity of themselves/their families OR because they aspire to be/rub elbows with people who are UES rich. Lots of nouveau riche on the UES…

Require infielders to sing in four part harmony before pitchers start their windup and continue until the ball is hit or received by the catcher. Outfielders must communicate using field chants.

Your sarcasm detector batteries appear fully charged.

Stop being so thoughtful, this is not an area for subtlety. You’re either in the GUNS, GOOD! camp or the GUNS, BAD! camp, none of this namby-pamby “guns are tools that responsible adults can use responsibly” bullshit.

Gun safety: wearing that same color to the bus stop every December morning as a kid in rural Pennsylvania so I wouldn’t be mistaken for a deer by some prick who never learned the lesson “don’t shoot what you can’t see.” And if the guy who picked off my cat with a 30.06 on my 11th birthday is reading this, fuck you.

Unless you were Luke Skywalker and found the thermal exhaust port, I think the sound a 12-pounder would make off the side of a modern steel warship would sound something like “plink!”

Doesn’t finishing your course of study and working on your thesis make you a candidate for a doctoral degree, not a candidate for doctoral study? Candidate for doctoral study sounds like a fancypants way to say “I applied to grad school.” If you google that phrase, only two sorts of pages come up: graduate school…

Their match with Leicester City redefined “friendly.”

Land at Dulles after week out of town, discover that WHFS has become El Sol in your absence.

Photoshop contest begins in 3, 2, 1 ...