All this talk of thumbs is getting FRIGHTENINGLY ableist.

My god, you fucking people.

You can always tell who just leapt over here to comment on stuff pre-research.

What status quo are you talking about? What’s the status quo HERE?

Yes, I'm sure their 9 viewers feel empowered now.

Finally, he’s been called out! Now I can rest easy. Thank you to those who police pre-Jeopardy hand gestures, as well as those who rate/validate social media apologies. Thoughts and prayers, as always, to those devastated by this horrific situation, but we can finally move forward as a nation.

Sometimes I wonder how Donald honest-to-God Trump managed to win a U.S. election (and then nearly another). Then I read something like this, which captures our nation’s current Outrage Factory of a mindset in an accurate but disappointing way, and it all adds up. Yeesh.

“Walking into the yogurt shop was an act of bravery in and of itself, and so to be inundated with foods labeled for those with food sensitivities felt like an attack.”

You are deeply and profoundly missed.

No, your statements were indeed terrible.

Yes, these all seem like harrowing, life-shattering experiences.

You keep suggesting that a stab wound to the VICTIM'S abdomen is something we should literally shrug off. Fuck me that's bleak

Is it successful at a 100% clip in Britain?

Here you’re suggesting it’s optimal to risk the stabbing victim’s safety over the stabber’s, and that’s just no good.

No, it appears you’re spot-on. He didn’t like the catchphrase a WB studio hack once suggested, so now WB isn't permitted to celebrate yesterday’s verdict.

Sorry but this article is all but unreadable. Not every sentence needs 12 clauses and 17 comma-pauses.

I know! Suddenly this is a watershed moment in American culture.

Nobody accepts these apologies, they critique them as artwork.

“Fisher says that in order to demonstrate the look he wanted, Johns dipped his shoulder in what struck Fisher as a servile posture.”

Oh they’re so dramatic and flamboyant it just makes me wanna SET MYSELF ON FIRE!!!