Shut up, the cowboy is already riding the nuke

Well, if I had a gun i’d just shoot myself but I dooont have a guuun.

Those bones have a “culture” problem

I got some “complaints” for calling everyone only sir and ma’am. Too formal. A lot thought I was the military when I can’t do a mile under 30min

People still listen to Nirvana unironically?

Gonna need it to make bunker vodka from them taters

There’s real people in Cali? Wait, nvm. I’m thinking LA.

To be fair Nick didn’t get a 9 iron to the face.

What i don’t get is wtf “sliding” into a DM means

Is it weird that I sorta wanted it to be Fahey? (Kidding)

It’s 2017, you can just grab em by the pussy now!! Didn’t you hear?!?

Well he was smart enough to pay an assistant he didn’t need for 12 years without being able to realize the worth of the position until a raise was mentioned.

I think you meant warrented

If someone worked for you for 12 years you should probably give them a raise. Firing someone for asking for a raise after they worked for you for 12 years is a shitbag move, period. That’s not how you grow a healthy company.

So the cop used the “he’s coming right for us” defense?

Someone at blizzard has a mid-life crisis and is channeling some shit

I’m gonna be that guy and point out the beef,lettuce, shredded cheese and sour cream crunch taco is not a traditional taco. It’s a burger with a structural twist. That being said, I do love me some Taco Bell.

This was rough to read

You’re not going crazy if your body really is slowly being consumed by a strange darkness

I would watch that show if it was a real thing. Just a bunch of lesbians in NYC trying to move the payload whilst sticking to the man. Someone call Lena Dunham!