I think about Goop’s death scene in Contagion. They opened her head, all the medical staff gasped, but we never got to know what horrific things were inside Gwynnie’s brain. 

My parents bought me an ear thermometer for my kid. The instructions said I should take the kid’s temperature now and then when he was calm and relaxed in room temperature to establish a base line, and then use that to decide if the kid had a fever. Of course, I only have to hold him to know if he has a fever, so the…

If I consent to being driven in a car, that does not mean I consent to being killed by a careless driver. It’s irrelevant what sex acts they did or did not consent to, if someone died, something went horribly wrong and someone should be held responsible. Negligent homicide at the very least

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When I was about to binge TNG, a wise friend advised me to start with season 3, watch the series to the end and then watch seasons 1 and 2. Some of the best advice I’ve ever gotten

I read books on my phone. The first book I read on the phone was engrossing enough that I could get past that it felt odd, and now that I’m used to it I’ve read tons of books. It’s nice to read again, instead of mindlessly jumping between the same dozen or so sites on the phone when I’m bored

You hear the same thing from millenials. That we can’t do anything, it’s too late, one person can’t change anything and corporations are worse offenders than people, but they won’t change so why should I, etc, etc. Young or old, people like making excuses and putting the responsibility on someone else

Happens to me too. I quit cold turkey like ten years ago, I still dream that I’m smoking, find myself holding pencils like cigarettes and get smacked in the gut with an overwhelming urge to smoke without warning now and then. It passes. 

Thank you for calling me a moron.

Not so much deported as ground down into protein bars for the thralls

KFC menu, McDonalds menu, Wendy’s menu, etc. and the books he and his offspring ordered some ghostwriter with no integrity who probably owed the mob money to cobble together wrote

“Josh Kloss" is a mouthful though. Imagine trying to say that after a few drinks...

My polish mother calls these “kopytka”, “goat hooves”, because she doesn’t roll them into balls, she makes a long roll that she cuts diagonally, like in the top image. If you put two of them next to each other, they look like goat hooves. She also only uses boiled potatoes that she puts through a ricer.

She won’t look like that a few years from now either, not unless she starts working out and actually gets some abs. The window where you can fit into modern beauty standards without working out is very, very narrow. 

I look like that if I don’t eat for a few days and hold my breath, abs or no abs. I’ve been super fit with toned abs, it looks different. And you don't have to hold your breath to have a flat stomach if you have a slender build and a strong core

I’m bummed she didn’t hyphenate her last name when she married, her initials would have been KKK. 

Use them all at once and see if they agree on anything

Use them all at once and see if they agree on anything

Many biologists are pessimistic about the ecosystems. This article brings up a few reasons why it can take decades and centuries for the ecosystems to recover:  https://www.thenational.ae/world/oceania/bushfire-crisis-threatens-to-change-australia-s-ecosystems-forever-1.965134

Sure, but wipe manufacturers need to stop writing "flushable" on the box. Technically true does not make it right

Which would you rather share with this dude's frequent guests, a toothbrush or a dildo?