“He who would make a pun would pick a pocket.”

“‘Oh my goodness, we all know the president only knows a hawk from a handsaw when the wind is southerly. Maybe we can get some wind machines or at least some fans in here for him. Can somebody look into it?’ That’s not an unreasonable thing to ask,” Mulvaney said.

“Chuckles” would seem to be arguing that Khan isn’t “British” because of his ethnicity and religion. Personally, I doubt he even believes that and simply likes getting attention for letting people on the internet metaphorically kick him in the balls.

Outdated & Dangerous: Why American Christianity Vanished Up Trump’s Ass

I’ll have what he’s having.

But is he a true Scotsman?

Pronoun police, arrest this nag...

It’s you hairsplitting motherfuckers that got us here in the first place. Next time, try to do something more productive than annoy absolutely everyone.

Won’t someone think of the pronouns?!?

Being uninterested in fucking with the other five things on your list, I’m going to say we have similar aversions and will endeavor to avoid trying Monique.

“One day you’re saving the rainforest...”

She’s only a few days from retiring, too old for this shit, almost got enough for that boat, and building a house.

I’d often wondered what it was my ass was yelling right before I fall asleep.

From the album Faulty Intelligence: Trump On Trump:

Whatever the answer is, it involves lots of pouches.

Ouch.

Love the “I meant to do that!” grin of every college freshman whose entire fashion line ends up reddish-purple after their first time doing laundry.

If Obama hadn’t made fun of him, he’d be happily handing out trophies at a monster truck show right now.

Wow. I would say being willing to watch those films in order is like going from cutting to throwing oneself down stairs to autocannibalism.

Different places have different/almost no rules for judges.