It would probably just wind up smushing stuff around since it really isn't that absorbent or clingy.

One commenter seems to love Speedoman.

Ooh, you're gonna get a call from The Ripping Friends for that Manman knockoff. Everyone knows you don't mess with John K.

Everybody's working for the weekend.

They don't specify here how it is measured, though.
5.6% Alcohol by Volume isn't that high.

Can you help me get in to Trump University?

Tyler Perry Presents: Tyler Perry's Preparatory Charter School

Well, as my mother always said, you have to crack a few cream eggs to make a cream omelet.

Bomb Drill! Everyone get under your desk!

My stupid sister in-law, and her son dropped by unannounced last night. I recused myself with the excuse that the baby woke up, then hid upstairs for the rest of the evening watching Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. This was a good decision.

Please don't tell anyone how I live.

It works on any Ayatollah! Ayatollah Nakhbadeh, Ayatollah Zahedi… Even as we speak, Ayatollah Colm Meaney and his cadre of fanatics are consolidating their power!

Cranny Smith?

We've got to stem this tidal wave of moral decay. It's time to shut down twitter.com!

*Spike Lee puts hit out on Emmanuelle Lewis*

To be fair, a lot of the really bad tweets were it just repeating what someone told it to say, which is a pretty dumb idea for a feature anyways.

Brie Larson?

Technical Boy was supposed to be a fat, zit-faced teen, not a skinny pretty boy. Maybe they'll put glasses on him to nerd him up a bit?

Well not so much a universe, but a Cinematic Basement really.

Everybody wants to put prosthetic foreheads on other people's real heads.