It seems to escape some people (male) that sisters/twins in a threesome is incest. So totally NOT hot for them or most of the known world (female). Guys are simply disgusting.

you didn’t actually read these, did you

Goddamnit, this makes me miss I Thee Dread pissing contests and Jolie even more.

I read way too many of these (up until “foxhead garlands”) before realizing this was satire.

For one second, I thought mandatory Crocs was an actual thing. We’re sure it isn’t, right?

J.Lo is that friend who, after a break-up, says “I need to stop being a serial monogamist and date ME for a change!” and then moves in with a new guy a month later.

No. It’s going to be a mess of the highest order. She’s in love with love and while he thinks he wants a woman who is his better or equal, what he really wants are strippers and Instagram girls to tell hims he’s pretty and smart 24/7. We’re going to have to endure emo drake songs about jlo in 2017

Yes, you are the only one.

One of my siblings’ mothers-in-law was like that. “When you get to be my age...” She was in her late 40s the first time I heard that one. She was surprisingly erratic though. She was very comfortable with gay people and used to ask about my boyfriend-now-husband whenever I saw her. On the other hand she used to…

Just gonna give you a hug. I also have a strong mother - who uses that extraordinary strength to pull other women, minorities and POC (and especially me) down. I love her and she breaks my heart every time.

Oh, please. Anybody who can’t keep their dick in their pants just because someone is hot needs to grow the fuck up. This may be a surprise to you, but men have agency as well.

Thank you! So sorry your mom trolls you. That’s terrible. Hopefully you can go raise hell on your own, which is totally badass!

As someone who has the tiny top scar herself, I can tell you exactly how to avoid the asshole look just below the scar- don’t have liposuction when you have a neck lift/lower face lift. It isn’t necessary once the neck lift is done and you almost always end up with weird skin reaction/swirls like you see in that…

Is it retrograde to hate that she went after a married guy though? Because I think it’s fucking shitty!

I hate that, too! It’s fine and dandy to compliment these women for their looks but people shouldn’t leave out the fact that many of these ladies have surgically enhanced features. Fitness magazines lauding Khloe K for her body is another example. She certainly has lost weight, but her body shape is man-made, and her…

I’m so jealous. Have fun with your mom. Mine and I are currently at a standstill because she is a conservative (as is the rest of my family🙄) but she’s the only one that trolls me. Super infuriating because she told me she was voting for Hillary and then I found out through my sister that our mom lied to me.

My mom and I will be at the one in Seattle, with feminist signs in tow. Hope to see some other PNW Jezzies there!

Okay so I’m not the only one that doesn’t think it’s naturally occurring.

It should be, she paid a lot of money for it.

What about kids of parents that just really hate each other but are still married?