"You take shit way too seriously, and that's the definition of pretentious"

I don't think the review is pretentious by any means. I think the critic is afraid of being irrelevant, and is compensating by taking completely empty music seriously. I don't even blame the critic. Critics will never make money if they simply reject this crap for what it is. This stuff doesn't deserve a review. It…

It's cracks me up how music critics are forced to take such miserable garbage and treat it like serious art, instead of the derivative and meaningless bullshit that it is. "Breastesses?" Really?!?