The show already would occasionally approach something close to art, though. There was one episode — I think with the Kings County, WA, Sheriffs Dept. — where during a pretty standard pursuit the suspect's pickup veers off onto a dirt road through a field of shoulder high grass — a road heading right toward a military…

To prepare my body for Mankind Divided, and because Divided's story apparently sets up some events in the first game, I'm going to play through the original Deus Ex again. I'll probably do it on the easiest setting just to expedite the process. Come to think of it, I've never done a fully lethal playthrough. Not sure…

I always assumed they ran a hose from the straw to a small vacuum pump. Not just for the actor's safety, but because wouldn't snorting multiple takes worth of huge rails of any kind of powder really fuck with the shooting timetable? I used to blow a lot of Adderall, and it takes forever to unclog your nose once you've…

An on set medic would have finally earned their "extract used condom from nasal cavity" wings?

I dunno. He thinks fat little man cheetahs are cool.

I've got the Simpsons edition. I also have not played it in years, but Monopoly is much better when everyone is quoting The Simpsons constantly.

Between "Lawman", his pathological self seriousness and his ludicrous Mac-from-"Always Sunny" performances at Russian martial arts exhibitions, Seagal just presents such an easy target.

Definitely. It reminds me of the "Gilligan's Island" themed restaurant in "Broom of the System", which I took in part as about being burned out on hyperreality.

This is oddly impressive in a "well, you took the time to do that" sort of way and deserves to be higher on the page.

Replaying Chronicles was … okay. The underwater sequences and the final level's sniping, especially during the shooting range sequence, were easier using the sticks. I'd imagine the scoped revolver would also be easier to aim with an analog controller, but I never used that gun except as a last defense against tigers.

I didn't have much fun replaying Tomb Raider either. I'm too spoiled by the sticks, and tapping the d-pad is in practice the only way to position Lara for jumps.

LOOK AT ME! I'M YOUR FUTURE! LET THE DREAM DIE! LET IT DIE!

It's pronounced "jow-dah!"

If I recall, there would be enemies with concealed guns or pointing their guns in a direction that didn't justify lethal force, and they'd pull on you unless you intimidated them into surrendering by shouting loudly. Or hitting them with a beanbag.

Red Faction had two particularly infuriating instances of this, where both times you had to get through a science complex disguised as a scientist. The only way to get through was to sneak past the guards without facing them too directly, pop them in the back of the head with a silenced pistol and haul their bodies…

FETISH SHIT!

Pass.

*Chewbacca makes chicken noises*

Conan really missed a great opportunity to include regular guest Timothy Olyphant in this skit.