Who wants cake!?

This is why I set up my adulterous liaisons through www.ashleyrnadison.com — All the fun of being scammed out of your money without having to deal with pesky actual people, and the cherry on top is that they stole my identity and sold to terrorists and now I cant fly anywhere!

Life i so hard when you must give rote policy speeches about decades-old conflagrations with half-a-million in the balance …

Steven Soderbergh's on a roll with the mid-life HBO crisis. I say we put him at the helm.

Maybe she read all the supportive things people said about her tits in YouTube comments on clips of her talk show appearances .

I would clear all my schedules for a non-sequitur miniseries anthology of New Journalism, as long as the second season viciously documents Hunter Thompson's frustrated decline into simultaneous irrelevance and obscurity juxtaposed against Tom Wolfe's coattail-riding, society-page fashion whoring.

I have spontaneous orgasms when obscure Achewood references pop up on the Internet.

Spamming a comment board full of internet-literate sarcastics with the oldest spam in the book is bad enough, but upvoting your own comment? That's downright gauche.

It would have been a huge gamble to fuck with something so intrinsically "Joan Rivers" as her voice. I don't see her taking it.

I thought about that, but eventually figured since the mice are accustomed to the hole being there, they'd just chew through the foam and I'd be back at step one.

I sent a very passionate email to their PR rep, got an instant robo-reply, and that's about all I'm expecting from them.

Well, my computer apparently knows more about what I'm talking about than I do.

Descent.

[You escape the towering inferno, hot-wire a taxi cab, and speed off down the nearest street. You come to a roundabout. There are roads to the west, east and north. A SAM BARSANTI sits on a milking stool in the middle of the roundabout, wearing an orange safety vest and clutching a handheld stop sign.]

Bejazzsnoodled? Shit set my iPhone on fire, yo.

Yeah, it really pulls back the curtain on Kickstarter more than the Zach Braff silly-billiness.

Oh whoops! Ooh, I dropped my monster condom that I use for my Magnus dong!

Oh my god, they are SUCH ASSHOLES. The link to the whole "I forgot my old email!" thing looped me back to the main page. Let me know if you have any success, and I'll vice-versa.

I don't remember my battle.net registered email or password, but I'm contacting their customer service about it!

Charisma, baby!