helpmeobiwan
Monkeygirl
helpmeobiwan

I resisted learning how to drive until I was almost 40 for many, many, many reasons. To save you a very complicated story of my emotional life (lol), I would highly recommend learning to drive. Consider it a life skill, like learning CPR, or learning how to swim. It was massively empowering and while I understand I

If your partner highlights and bolds the things you hate about yourself and makes you feel even worse, he is not a good partner. He should be encouraging you, not grinding you down. He has known these things about you for a decade. Why is now the time to tell you how much you fucking suck? It doesn’t matter if it

After 10 years, I finished paying off my student loans today! *High fives all around*

Like a middle aged drunk auntie who rolls in on christmas eve several airplane cocktails in and comes downstairs after unpacking with no pants on and instantly brings a new vibe to the family christmas show. Totally been there.

How many of us have been in love with someone we should not be in love with? All of us? I’ve been carrying on a relationship with someone who I don’t love but I’m in love with the idea of us being in love. Does that even make sense?

Right? I didn’t hate my ex. It was painful and sad and I was angry at him at times, as I sure he was at me. But to look at this person you used to just love unreservedly and see it all falling apart is nothing less than fucking brutal.

I hope you never go through a divorce. Maybe I did my divorce “wrong” but there was nothing enjoyable about it. Not even “darkly enjoyable.” Devastating and tedious? Sure.

Jermaine Clement and Molly Shannon deserve better shows and roles than they pull.

Anyone of any gender who demands that you either get hitched or break up is not someone you want to marry, ever. Sorry, Ann.

Meh. Saying something ugly and regrettable in the heat of the moment kind of pales in comparison to murdering your children.

Ahh one more month and my divorce is final!! It takes FOREVER in California. And we just got an offer on the house we own together! It’s all finally ending!!

Author Khloe Kardashian got a little out of character on Twitter today after the truth came out about some pies she

On Erika’s beau: Is that a mustache or the Beckham’s new dog?

I’ve been commenting here since 2010 and I am still in the grays. =(

Now playing

I like Miley. She’s living her life and doing her thing. Her voice is unique; one doesn’t hear very many contralto voices in pop music anymore. Everyone wants to see who can hit a higher note than the next person, meanwhile I’ve played this video of her cover of Summertime Sadness over and over for the past few months.

still a kind of weird and unstable thing

I die!!! Sorry. I was type/ranting.

Oh, holy mother of fuck - if I weren’t on hiatus from sugary stuff, I’d power throttle the shit out of this, right into my muthafuckin’ face hole. Jesus shit...

How very nice of you to assume that when France is doing something, it must be stupid.