I would encourage people to not buy flavored spirits, since while (for example) “mango and tequila” is a good flavor combination, you will get better results combining actual mango with a tequila you already know you like. Generally “flavored spirits” are a way for distillers to sell a lower quality product at a…

Once again industries sort of fail to understand that the fundamental issue is that everybody wants to enjoy something special from time to time, but younger people were born into an economic system really stacked against them so they’re only going to do the stuff they can actually afford to do.  Whereas our parents…

The secret is that every champagne cocktail is kind of good, and also something you’re not really inclined to produce at home since once you crack the bottle you have to finish it. Like there’s a reason that mimosas at brunch are a thing at restaurants (which will go through several bottles depending on the crowd) and…

The thing about icon chasing in a great big sandbox is that this is a great thing to have when it’s what you want, but moods are not entirely predictable so it contributes more to “buying the Assassin’s Creed game on sale for when you want that in your life” than “being hyped to pay full price”.

Digitial menu boards are an innovation?  I think Arby’s has had them for 10 years and my local tacqueria has had them for 4-5.

I’m going to miss being able to blacken chile skins by throwing them directly on the flame.

As someone who also strongly prefers Trek to Wars, I will also not be appearing in any Star Wars movies.

Yeah, it wouldn’t be impossible for BK to make something that you could understand as a torta with ingredients they could get, it’s just that their process of refining it to make it more inexpensive, efficient, and to make it the same from restaurant to restaurant means you’re almost certainly better off hitting up…

So the robot picks a pre-prepared thing off a shelf, fills it with something, and gives it to you? I’m there are high school kids working their first summer job who can manage that. Fry cook is way more involved.

I know this is probably unlikely, but there’s no game I’d be more jazzed about a respiffed version of than New Vegas.

It really seems like Smuckers lost this when they didn’t do anything about all the sandwich presses/cutters that literally say “Uncrustables” in the product description.

I am absolutely capable of feeling guilt about basically anything, so “guilt free” was always a challenge.

It genuinely feels like “rich idiot who got rich because of luck and timing, and gets called a genius because he’s rich not because he’s not an idiot” is an archetype, it’s just that we live in a world with several living, breathing embodiments of that archetype.

Nobody would mind Harry Potter of Joanna had just taken her riches and lived in her castle and found something constructive to do with her time that’s not “be a ringleader for a hate movement.” Nobody regrets their Hunger Games fandom because of anything Suzanne Collins says because you don’t hear a peep from her.

Fruitcake is a thing that showcases how capitalism ruins things. A great fruitcake is kind of a pain in the ass (I baste mine in brandy daily for two weeks), and so it’s actually a good thing to be gifted. Because of the meaning contained in the effort, it becomes to signify “ a good gift” so we try to figure out how…

I confess, I wasn’t sure that they even used ovens.  The crumbl cookie I had seemed to work on the principle - “If we use ingredients that are safe to eat raw, we can serve people seriously underbaked cookies so they will mistake that texture for a pleasant one.” 

A candle is such a bizarre thing to put in a box like this.  Since it’s a collector’s item, and it’s supposed to be stuff you keep around for a while and treasure, but if you burn the candle then you don’t have it anymore.  On the other hand, a candle you don’t want to burn is a waste of space.

The technical name for “change in acceleration” is “jerk” and we can be sure that Tesla still has the biggest jerk in the business.

I would offer “any large countertop appliances with limited utility.” I’m the person in my family who cooks, and some winners from my eldest brother include “a deep fryer” (I own a dutch oven and a thermometer), a countertop meat slicer (have never used, have no intention of using), and a countertop electric meat…

I mean, mashed avocado is lime and salt away from being guacamole to begin with.