I was today years old when I learned that TikTok wasn’t already free.

Really, the differences between ISIS and the MAGA set are mostly superficial.

This summer is much hotter, and much less antagonistic towards places like Starbucks than last summer.

I appreciate that McDonalds is keeping me informed of which musicians are popular with the youths, as I would have never otherwise heard of them.

I mean, the “never ketchup under any condition”set is sleeping on how delicious currywurst can be.

I’m sure these are great onions, but I cannot for the life of me understand why people are narrow-minded about “what you can put on a hotdog”. This summer I’ve made hotdogs with pico de gallo, chili crisp, Malaysian peanut sauce, and esquites and they were all delightful.

The maximum theoretical difficulty of an Olympic sport is found in Judo, in which a “Golden Score” period (when the score is tied after the allotted time) has no maximum length.  You could have an eight hour session if nobody makes a mistake or collapses from exhaustion.

The “fun” part of living in a destabilizing climate is finding out all the new things that can go wrong.

The weird thing about this, is that as a white person who grew up with oatmeal as the baseline “bland, nutritious porridge” the whole appeal to congee for me is “you can add things to this that would feel weird for me to put into oatmeal.”  Like peanuts, crunchy fried shallots, stir fried pork and cabbage, etc. 

It didn’t help that I only found out about the “free sandwich from 10 to 2" at 3 PM local time.

Wait, are the tickets what you spend to play the game or what you earn playing the game (and turn in for erasers, and pencil sharpeners and the like)? If the former, how many games of Skee-Ball does 250 buy?  If the latter, how many pizzas would I need to buy to get a pencil eraser?

I confess, my reasons for eating fish are mostly about “it’s (sometimes) better for the environment” or “it’s healthier than other proteins” and has little to do with the texture or the taste.  But I’m extremely landlocked (I’m within a day’s drive of the North American Pole of Inaccessibility.)

I honestly thought yeet was “to dispose of, by throwing at high velocity”.  Like when Florida lost to LSU last college football season due to a penalty on the defense when a DB hurled a shoe downfield being dubbed “the Cleat Yeat”.

The App Store from which nothing can be removed sounds like trouble if it’s not just a marketing lie (which it is).  If it’s not a lie for marketing, it’s not hard to see it filling up with malware and illegal stuff really quickly.  I mean, your target audience for this phone is people who gave their SSNs to Parler...

Since cocaine is really just “a compound that’s found in leaves, isolated and concentrated” it’s not like an ethically sourced version of the same should be some kind of absurdity.

Where does one acquire raw honey?  My brother keeps bees, so I could just ask him but he’s like 1400 miles away.  Do they sell it in stores?

You can just go to Target and buy a new sealed copy of Skyrim.  It’s the Switch version though, so I guess they’re paying a premium for the Xbox 360 experience.  Switch version runs better though.

It’s an uphill battle, because just reading this article’s title before clicking on it made me want Jamon Iberico, and I’m not even Spanish (and it’s *really* expensive).

I think I will eat one of these.  Papa Murphys is my chain-pizza of choice.

I have a hard time justifying going to Whole Foods because I already spend enough money on Amazon and Jeff Bezos is already the richest man who ever lived.