This Pissing Contest is making me feel super lame because I have no good stories, just your garden variety sleeping around and making bad decisions and crying a lot.

Tracked down his wife and told her everything.

I went to prom with the first guy I ever slept with. I was going to wear a dress I’d bought for another event so I told him he could wear whatever suit he had. I realized this was a mistake when he showed up in frayed corduroy pants with a miss-matched corduroy jacket, and also in Berkenstocks, looking like an English…

Not crazy, per se, but I had a a time-limit set with my ex. I told him we were breaking up as soon as undergrad was over and he (said he) was okay with it. So I decided to break up in style. I invited our friends over for a party, we had a kegger, and my friend (who said boyfriend had cheated on me with but everyone…

Flushed the beta she gave me down the toilet, then returned the bowl to her house with a goldfish cracker in it. Definitely not my proudest moment.

I screamed “Fuck you! I’m moving to France!”

It worked!

My only serious college boyfriend and I were both huge stoners and our relationship mostly revolved around smoking out of his giant, beloved two-foot decorative purple bong named “The Mystery Machine,” having sex and playing Super Smash Bros. Melee. He was in the Army ROTC had to enter the service after college. Since…

It’s not so crazy because I didn’t actually go through with it, but I got as far as shopping for plane tickets online to go to Vegas to meet up with - AND MARRY - a different ex.

I was going through a very ugly divorce. My husband cheated multiple times and eventually moved out. While this was going on, I had to change the locks on the doors to my house due to a burglary, and didn’t tell him. One day, he stopped by to get something from the house and couldn’t get in. He flew into a rage and…

Craziest thing I’ve done after a breakup? Gained 40 lbs, had sex once and a mental breakdown twice.

Stopped dating... after the last highly manipulative cheating sack. I was in my mid-thirties. I am now 56. AND very happily single.

When I found out my long term boyfriend had a new girlfriend, while we were still living together, I walked to the nearest travel agent and booked a flight to Europe, got an express passport and then quit my job. I was outta there in under two weeks.

Boned my hot 40-year-old Anatomy professor.

My ex cheated on me with his brothers girlfriend. He then had the audacity to ask for his high school lacrosse hoddie back (he was 22 this should have been a warning sign). I burned it at a bonfire, took a picture and put the ashes in a box with the picture.

That was an absolutely terrible thing to do.

When my partner left me in 2006, I was devastated. After I talked myself out off the ledge, I took my child and fucked off to a beach town in South America where I rented an apartment. I partied hard and cried like a crazy person. After I was cried out and had let go of my partner, I felt much later. The next day I…

I fold in on myself when I go through a bad break-up. No drama, no public displays of emotion, just balling up in tears quietly at home. When my high school/college boyfriend of almost four years and I broke up, I was mostly fine - it was time and I was ready for it to end as well. That is, until I saw him talking to…

I moved to Jamaica.

I have ex stories, but those are not fun. I do have a concert story to share that I wasn’t able to last week because it was the end of the semester and I had four different things due and had no time for anything else. It is a long story, but I love it.