They're definitely really satisfying to watch in that "things organized neatly" kind of way.

I genuinely read "Snoop Dogg" instead of "Show Dog" and I got really scared.

"Hi, honey! How was school today?"

Meanwhile, other eco-conscious brides decide to wear something they already own.

As a three-year-old, I gathered up a big armful of my mom's pads, ran into the room where my parents had a guest over, and shouted, "MINTS!" as I threw them into the air.

Same on the scalp and gums front. WHATEVER IT IS that I'm avoiding by using sulfate-free hair products and toothpaste, it's working.

Not sure if it counts as a proposal or not... My emotionally abusive ex broke down in tears at one point when he realized I was going to go through with not living with him after I had become incredibly depressed and anxious. During that horrible conversation he offered to marry me, as some sort of concession. "I…

I definitely figured this one out all on my own. The panic that set in that first time I realized I couldn't pee right away because I had peed before sex… ended up frantically drinking loads of water and listening to the sink run for a good while and just squeezed out every drop that I could.

Two of the seven I've handled were pretty uniformly unveiny. Very smooth. One other penis was like so veiny, I think veiny would be the first descriptor on the mind of anyone who saw it.

Why is she dressed like a veiny penis?

I'm a tall lady, and I have a date coming up with a guy who's a bit shorter than me… I'm pretty sure I can carry him around easily… is the first date too soon to try this?

You know who should play Moses? Any of my swarthy Jewish uncles.

Uterinissima

TEAM ROCKET'S BLASTING OFF AGAAAAAAaaiinn *shiiiiiiing*

This is like when people winced at women named Katrina.

I'm B+. It's like a commandment to be optimistic. BE POSITIVE, harr harr
So I have a positive outlook on everything I eat. Ice cream? It has calcium in it. It's definitely really good for me. I should eat more of it.

Even leaving aside the disturbing issues of psychological harm, this is also a really fucking obvious HIPAA violation.

Yeah this is for when doggy style gets so intense, you both are about to fall over, and you just hunker down and ride it out from here. Perfectly fine.

I've been fortunate enough to have been culinarily gifted (and did typically make food alongside an adult so tbh they get most of the credit), but I did learn when I was 13 that under no circumstances should you allow garlic to burn. I deliberately did it while making pasta because I liked the charred, carcinogenic…

KANYE IS THE LAST AIRBENDER