You’re wrong. Harambe would be soundly beaten by Boaty McBoatface...

If you are talking about a 2020 election between a dead gorilla and Donald Trump, I’d vote for the gorilla in a heartbeat - no convincing needed. At least a dead gorilla can’t actively make the country any worse than it already is, like the live orangutan currently in the office can.

(yes, I know orangutans and…

I would vote for Harambe the Dead Gorilla if he was the Democratic nominee running against Trump in 2020. Regardless of what Maddow or Winfrey say.

Yeah, there were a couple weeks where people thought they wanted Oprah to run for president

Most people who whine about Splinter don’t tend to read the site very closely.

First President to flee abroad to avoid prosecution? 

sadly, you are not incorrect here ... and my depression now deepens

I own fucking plenty myeself.

might I propose “offer the people whose votes you want a reason to vote for you next time”

welcome to democracy, i see you’re new. those people? they get to vote. their vote counts for the same amount as the republican friends you’re so terrified of offending. there is a trick to get their vote: you tell them you will help them. this is referred to as “transactional politics,” or “politics” for short.

Do you need a time out

You know what?  I'm kind of in favor of Lewis Black's idea to re-elect the corpse of Ronald Reagan.  REALLY lean into the crazy for a few years.  I'm blue, but fuck it, I'd vote him in to have the Star Wars program again.

Don’t give them ideas.

“He’s a profoundly unserious human being. Why anyone thought he could hold his own against actual skilled adult politicans is beyond me”

Personally I am glad that people are realizing that someone who says nice things and seems very likable isn’t qualified for president for saying nice things and seeming very likable.

He almost charmed his way to a Senate seat here in Texas, mostly propelled by middle aged women who didn’t know much about him at the time except he has a nice smile and a nice voice that says a lot of nice things. Mom-groups would get together to go to his rallies and eat it up. But then he would stumble in debates…

I mean this guy did a facebook live thing for a haircut. Oh well. He was big here in Texas for Senate and got my vote, but he’s not a national candidate.

“I could assault someone on Fifth Avenue and not lose any voters”

I wonder what the next generation of children will learn about the current US president. These are some other books for children about US presidents. What will future kids books and school books say about Trump? The most rape-accused president of all times? The most provably lying president of all times? 

I can’t wait to NOT follow this story on any major news outlet.