The story about the cancer-free anniversary “date” is one of the most pathetic things I’ve ever read. That’s some Ralph Wiggum/Lisa Simpson shit right there.

I like the dress but I would have loved to see Beyonce wear something relevant. I would have liked to see her in this:

Your “Latinos, always wearing striped cardigans!” reminded me of the time a co-worker found out I’m hispanic (I’m super pale and married a white guy so I get this a lot) and she said “I should have known. You always wear really bright clothes like red cardigans and stuff!” “Um, yeah, have to be colorful in case…

It’s a stock photo!

TWO WHOLE YEARS AGO. Like, did color TV even exist then?

I don’t know, but she is clearly having a lot of trouble understanding race relations, punctuation, and how colors work. I hope she gets the help she needs in school, and, in the meantime, at least she has her kind and loving personality to fall back on.

What is this verbal diarrhea?

I wish people could just own their mistakes.

Oh, they’re not so very racist.

I don’t have Aspergers, and I have NO IDEA. Just a gpoy, I think.

I’m half expecting Bruce to be trolling all of us and the reveal will be something totally inconsequential.

Is she allergic to weed? Because that’s an awful lot of nose-rubbing for “rolling a joint.”

Wait I keep re-reading this and I still can’t figure out how the bottle of conditioner came into play.

Yep. It was multi colored from what I remember. They also hit the pipe in the limo. Good times. No shame in her game. Quad cities gonna Quad...

I used to know a woman (dead now) who claimed she’d lost her virginity to Jim Morrison. Though it was consensual, she said he howled like an animal the whole time and it was completely traumatizing.

My wife’s friend banged George Clinton. Took a clump a hair for a souvenir.

literally, none of the music is great.

Well, technically, it’s glucose that your brain can’t function without. Your liver produces glucose not only from carbs, but from proteins and fats. It’s a common misconception.

I’m not going to get into a big argument over it, but a healthy functioning liver will produce all the blood glucose required if you are getting proteins and fats. I guess I should have been clear that I meant ingesting carbs is not necessary. Where most people generally misunderstand is they also cut fats out of…